Little Hope That's Left

Chapter 6

Hi, I know that y'all don't like this, I don't either, but I would like to say a few things really quick:
1) don't copy this story that's just rude
2) I'm not professional so please don't be mean about mistakes
3) this story is fiction
4) please let me know about thoughts and books that you are writing, I love to read. Go on with the book...

The Friday:

It has been two days since I was in the hospital, and I have to school today, Friday. I do not understand why I have to go for a day, but I have to so whatever. Angel has been really helpful by bringing me homework and catching me up, and just being there for me. She is a really kind person in heart, but can come off mean if you piss her off. Another great person who has been helping me in Tristan. No matter what he is going through, he always seems to put everyone else before him, and I think that what he does is perfection in its highest form.
I smile at the thought of Tristan, while I am getting ready for my first day back. I absolutely hate school, I mean I love learning, but I hate school. There are so many kids, very dumb and immature kids, and not enough teachers to actually teach the kids.
"Foreves!" Tristan yells from the livingroom. Since my car is getting repaired, Tristan is driving me to and from school. Not only that, but my parents are not allowing me to drive because I was being irresponsible and immature when I wrecked my car.
"Coming!" I holler back at him, trying to shimmy into black skinny jeans, and slide into a batman half-shirt with long sleeves. I take one look at myself in the mirror and smile. I look great, for a girl who was in a wreck and did not do anything for five days. I know what Tristan will sayto me, but I do not care.
"Foreves, go do something with your hair, and try to be yourself." The pleading look of his pouting face, sends me back into my room to pamper myself up and be 'me'.
I still had tear streaks from last night when I cried myself to sleep. It was my first night back, and Two-Step, my wonderful puppy, was not here. I named him Two-Step because when my parents first gave him to me, he would take two steps and sit back down. He was amazing. He was black and half pug and half french pug. He was the cutest thing in the world, and now he is gone.
I almost start to cry again, but Tristan wraps his arms around me from behind, and mumbles "It will be alright." I smile, not because I am happy or because he is helping, but because be cares about me and that is what means the most to me. "Let's go." He pulls me out of my apartment and into the hell, recently called school.
Through out the day people tell me how sorry they are and how much they wish it did not happen, but they are just lifeless, meaningless and careless words. We, as humans, use these words a lot more than we should, and we knownthey do not help, but we continue to use them. In all honesty, I have no clue why, we just do.
Currently, I am back home with Tristan on the left of me and Jakie to the right of me, on the couch. C.C. on the chair and Angel and her boyfriend, whose name I just found out, Zack, on the floor. We are watching Criminal Minds and munching on junkfood or in my case fruit. I would be eating junkfood, but I am on my period and the thought of junkfood sickens me. The only thing that I can fully eat on my period, without me wanting to throw up, is fruit. Do not ask me why, but that is the way I am, and all of them, minus Zack, knows this.
I will not have to tell Zack, because he will be gone before next Friday, and she will be with a new guy. She does not stop, ever. I hqve tried to talk to her about it, but she continues to go through guys fatser than I can catch their names. I barely try and remember them now, they are gone before I can even get to see them twice. I hate that she does this, but there is nothing that I can do to make her stop. I love that she is open to so many guys, I just wish that she would slow down. It is like eating a slushie too fast and getting a brain freeze, so throwing it out and getting a new flavor. I mean it is pointless to flip through boys like pages in a book. Just like revenge, it is utterly and completely pointless; meaningless and a waste of out beatiful time.
"Hey Infinity?" Zack says my name as of a question, asking if it was right. I look at him, silently telling him that he is correct and that he could continue. "Why is your name Infinity?" I blankly stare at him. Out of all the questions he could have asked, he asked the one that I did not have a lie ready and up for. I knew why my parents named me Infinity, but I did not want him, or any of them to know why, and for that same reason, I do not want any of them asking about siblings.
After I avoided Zack's question, and everyone left, I should there, very confused. I knew that I should tell them, but I do not want to, but at the same time, I feel as though I need to. They are such great friends to me, but even they have secrets, so can I just keep these two? They are not that big, but they are a little bit. I mean I might have a half-brother or sister and I might have had a twin at some point, but not anymore, but I feel as thought telling them this would make them feel differently about me. All of this and thoughts of Holden swarm into my mind and create the biggest storm you have ever seen. With blurred thoughts and a confused heart, I do the one thing I swore to never to do again.
The blade thick with weight in my hand and the blood flowing freely from my wrist, I stare at it in amazement. The way that the thickened colored moved as it pushed out of my skin, had me in a dase. It had me in such a dase, that it sliced through the thin layers of my skin again and again, allowing my arm to look like a red river, flowing faster with each cut of the blade. Getting darker with each slice through the skin. I become bolder and bolder, going deeper and deeper into my arm, feeling all of my mental pain disappering, getting replaced with real pain. The pain sends my body in hyper drive, making me realize what I have done and reach for the phone, speed dialing the first name that comes to mind.
"Tristan, I-I" Was all I could get out before I choked on tears, suddenly feeling a wave of nausa hitting me hard, almost sendjng me tumbling to the floor.
"I'll be right there, don't do anything." Somehow he was able to know exactly what I did, and I instantly felt bad, because he should not be able to know. This should be completely new to him, but the scars on his wrists and mine prove us otherwise. I can not think, by the time my floor is painted red. The sound of Tristan's voice is now a meer muffle and I can no longer feel the burning of my wrists, it is all just numb. My vision is getting darker by the second, and I there is nothing that I can do to stop it. This is all my fault, I have brought this upon myself and Tristan and everyone else and I can only blame me.
"I am so sorry." I mumble incoherent words, before everything is gone, but one person, stuck in my imagination; Tristan

~

Dear Human Reading,

I know that you don't like author notes, I don't either, but I want you to know a few things.

- I am not a good writer, so I apologize

- I don't know where this book is going, but it will go somewhere

- I will post the amount of words in each author note

- I love to read, so post your books in the comments and I will read, vote, and comment

- I am a bad writer, so please leave notes so that I can fix mistakes

- You don't have to read the author's note, they just tell a little bit of information about me, or the book or my life or something else

- There are 1799 words in this chapter

- Oh my, I just saw that 91 ppl have read this. Thank you sooooo much!!!

- You will probably not get another chapter for a week, but by then you will most likely get 3 or 4, possibly 5 chapters, so hopefully it is worth the wait. You can decide how you want it done, but if I were you I would rather wait then have 5 back to back, just saying

- Please comment!! I need direction and advice

- I will have the entire book (26 chapters) done and published (all at once) hopefully by yhe end of April, so it might be awhile before I post again. I will only post chapter 7 and maybe 8 before I stop and post all at once. I am sorry if anyone hates this idea, but this is how I am doing it. With STAAR and homework and people and the book, my life has became a stressful mess and I want to fix it. Sorry for the problems.

- This chapter is shorter by almost exactly 200 words, and I apologize, but I thought that this was the best way to end the chapter, just like the others, on the edge of your seat cliffhanger, and I want you to know that I do that because I want to keep you interested in the book and I think I am doing a good job, well probably not a good job, but anyway yeh so sorry for this shorter chapter, and sorry for it not being 2000 words, but like stated I am extremely stressed

Thank you,

Cherry