Loren and Kristi [Transgender Love Story]

Chapter One

Chapter One

I lift my head up from the toilet as I sit on the bathroom floor on my knees with the after taste of the breakfast I just threw up in my mouth. This is already the second time I've gotten sick today and I'm starting to wonder if I shouldn't of agreed to do this. At two months pregnant you would think I would have nothing to complain about but you would be wrong. I'm not like the lucky ones that don't have to go through having morning sickness and not being able to keep anything down. I assumed being pregnant wouldn't be so hard and would not be so bad but I was wrong. I get to experience it all even though I would rather not.

I can't wait for it to be over, the whole pregnancy. I don't see how some people love being pregnant and never want it to end when I feel exactly the opposite. So far I haven't been enjoying being pregnant when everything makes me sick. It is almost like this baby already hates me and wants me to suffer. I blame Kristi for this I really do because she promised it wouldn't be this bad. I should have known she was lying that everything would be easy. I don't even want to think about how bad it is going to be when the baby arrives. I decided to put worrying about the delivery until it happens or else I will just feel worse than I already do now.

"I brought these for you." Kristi says trying to hand me a small packet of crackers.

"Kristi, I'm not really in the mood to eat right now. Haven't you noticed?" I say looking at her then back at the toilet.

"I know but Lexy said crackers might help with the morning sickness." she answers.

"I'm fine," I reply flushing the toilet and getting up from the floor. I walk to the bathroom counter and grab my toothbrush wanting to get the disgusting taste out of my mouth.

"It will get better once the morning sickness ends. Trust me Loren okay?" she says trying to reassure me with a smile.

I stop from brushing my teeth and ask, "Yeah right then once that ends I'll start showing and after I will have to worry about giving birth?"

"Yeah but our baby will be growing inside of you. I'd give anything to have our baby grow inside me Loren. Why do you care what other people might think?" she says in a somber tone.

She starts to walk away and I know she is right. I shouldn't care what people think I try not to but it's hard. I have always let what people say about me get me down. I just don't want to be seen as a freak especially now. I feel like I would be judged even more than before because I'm choosing to live as a guy yet I'm using my female reproductive system to have child.

Kristi doesn't see it from my point of view. Not only will I be judged by regular people but also from other transgender people. They would question my gender like I have been these past few months. I know who I am and how I feel but with all the hormones due to the pregnancy it causes me to question myself all over again. The only thing I'm certain is I have to apologize to Kristi for what I said.

I finish brushing my teeth and walk out into the living room. I look over seeing Kristi sitting on our old beat up couch flipping the channels on the TV with the remote. "I'm sorry about the way I acted. I shouldn't have said that I didn't mean for it to come out that way. To answer your other question no I don't care what people would think. “I say.

She looks up at me giving me a faint smile. "It's okay Loren I know you didn't mean anything by it. Let's just sit on the couch and watch a movie?"

"Okay just let me get something to drink. Why don't you pick something out to watch?" I say walking towards the kitchen.

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you." Kristi says getting up from the couch to stop me.

"Why?" I ask glancing into the kitchen from the living room doorway seeing a huge mess of red. "Kristi I think we need to talk. What did you do? Did you murder someone in the kitchen? I wasn't in the bathroom that long was I?" I ask joking and curious to know how Kristi could make such a big mess in only a few short minutes.

"Funny Loren of course I didn't murder anyone. I just I had a little accident while you were in the bathroom." she replies.

"Little?" I ask raising an eyebrow.

"Well okay a big accident. Umm you know how I was in the process of making a red velvet cake? Well I don't think that's going to happen today. I kind of dropped all the cake mix on the floor when I was trying to grab the crackers for you. Don't worry though I'll clean it up right now." she says walking passed me into the kitchen.

I walk behind her following her into the kitchen as she grabs the mop and a bucket of water. Our kitchen isn't big just enough room but not enough counter space which might explain why the cake mix is all over the floor. "Didn't I tell you to avoid putting things near the edge?"

"I didn't have it on the edge it was all the way over here. I accidently bumped it and it fell. Don't laugh Loren." Kristi says embarrassed and her cheeks blushing red.

"I don't know why this surprise me I've been with you for five years and you have never managed to get through one day without something happening." I say trying not to laugh. "I'll clean it up knowing you; you will probably manage to make it worse than it is."

I grab the mop from her hands and watch as a smile appears on her face. "I'm going into the living to pick a movie to watch." she says wrapping her arms around my shoulders and kissing me on the lips. "I love you."

"I love you too" I reply kissing her back.

She lets go of me and skips to the living room leaving me stuck to clean the mess she left me. The smell of the cake mix on the floor is starting to cause me to be nauseous. Hopefully I can finish cleaning this before I become sick and have to clean another mess. I can already tell it is going to take a while to clean this since it is just going to smear everywhere else instead of cleaning it. I guess this is the price of being in love.

***

When I finally get done cleaning the floor I look up only to see Kristi in the doorway giggling. "What?" I ask.

She smiles and says, "Oh nothing I just like watching you sometimes."

"Watching me clean?" I ask confused.

"Can't I just watch you and be happy without being questioned?" she demands.

"Yeah you can if you want. So did you pick a movie to watch?" I reply as I put the mop and bucket away walking closer to her.

"Uh huh our favorite movie." she says with a memorizing smile.

"Oh and what's that?" I ask thinking of what movie she is talking about.

"You know what it is. Come on I want to lay on the couch and relax." she says grabbing my hand and leading me into the living room. I lay on my right side on the couch with Kristi lying in front of me and my arms wrapped around her.

I never pictured I would be where I am right now when I was younger but I'm glad I am. I'm fortunate I met Kristi because without her my life wouldn't be complete. Even though I wasn't excited about the pregnancy I can deal and enjoy the next seven months. I'm going to have to I'm carrying our baby.