"Wake up," I prod Darren in the stomach. He groans loudly and rolls over, pulling the pillow over his head.
"Darren!" I groan, poking him hard in the back.
"No, fuck off, mum."
I stand back, my hands on my hips.
"I am NOT your mother," I snap, "now get out of bed, get dressed and come and have breakfast. You'll be late for school!"
As I walk into the kitchen Mum raises her eyesbrows at me.
"You're really not his mother," she says sarcastically. I grin at her sheepishly.
"I just feel like a mother," I tell her, sitting down at th kitchen table. Mum laughs and hands me some toast.
"Plans for this afternoon?" she asks. Suddenly the toast is hard to swallow.
"Uh, going to the adoption agency," I mutter. Mum grabs my hand and squeezes it.
"You don't have to do this," she tells me, "you love this baby-"
"Which is why I have to do it," I interrupt, "seriously, mum, it's better for everyone."
Mum sighs deeply.
"If that's your choice."
"Uh, morning," Darren says from the doorway.
"Morning," Mum and I chorus.
"Come and have some toast," Mum says. Darren grins at me as he sits down.
"Good start to the day, huh?"
***
"It'll be fine."
I glare at Darren. If toast was a good start to the day, it went very downhill from there.
I glance at the receptionist again. She's still on the phone.
"She's scary," I mutter to Darren, "how do we know she won't eat our baby?"
Darren chuckles as the receptionist hangs up the phone.
"Hi, how can I help?" she asks. I almost roll my eyes.
"We have an appointment," I say, "Darren and Amber?"
The receptionist flicks through some files, muttering to herself.
"Ah! Darren and Amber, about five months along, sex of baby unknown, bed side adoption, yes?"
I nod, feeling as if I'm going to throw up.
"And you were looking for an open or closed adoption?" she asks, holding a pen over a section of the form.
"Open."
"Close."
I look at Darren who shrugs at me.
"Open," I tell the lady before whispering to Darren, "you don't have to see the pictures!"
"Alright, well, we've arrange for a couple to meet you today," she says, "you can ask them anything you like, and vice versa, and after that we'll talk to both parties separately and see what you think."
I follow the lady into a large room with two couches. There's a man and woman who look in their thirties sitting on the couch, looking as nervous as I feel. I reach back to Darren and feel his hand close around mine as we sit down.
"So, feel free to ask any questions, and let me know when you're done."
I study the woman carefully. She's dressed in a white dress with white heels. Her hands are folded neatly on her lap and she has perfect french nails. Her... Husband, if I read the rings correctly, is dressed in a suit and his shoes are immaculet and shinier than anything should be.
"Well, I'm Faith," the woman says after a moment of silence, "and this is my husband, Simon."
"Nice to meet you," I reply, "I'm Amber and this is Darren."
"Pleasure," Simon says.
"Well, uh, I suppose I'll start," I say, glancing nervously at Darren, "how old are you?"
"I'm thirty two and Simon is thirty three," Faith replies immediately.
"Why're you adopting?" Darren asks.
"Well," Faith blushes, "Simon is infertile."
"Accident when I was young," Simon puts in, "do either of you have any STIs?"
"No," I say, shocked.
"Well, if you've been sleeping around, it's a possibility," he shrugs. I try not to feel too offended.
"Well, why do you want children?" I ask.
"Well, a child is not children," Simon laughs, "we want one because it's expected."
"Okay, I'm done," I say, getting up.
"Oh, wait!" Faith protests, "I have more questions!"
"I don't," I say, beckoning to Darren who obeidiantly follows me out of the room.
"I wouldn't give them a dog," I mutter as we approach the receptionist. Darren chuckles and gives my hand a squeeze.
I presume that means he approves.
"We're done," I say as Simon and Faith come walking out of the room, looking upset and confused.
"I don't understand," Faith says, "aren't we supposed to ask more questions?"
"I take it," the receptionist asks me directly, "you've decided they're not the ones?"
I nod and Simon makes and outraged noise. Faith begins to sob quietly.
"Well, we have another couple coming in," she says, ignoring Faith and Simon, "if you want to wait in the room, I'll send them in when they arrive."
I lead Darren back in and slump down on the couch.
"I hate this," I complain, "can't we go back to the good old days where we leave it in a box on some nice old lady's doorstep, knock and run?"
Darren laughs and ruffles up my hair.
"Sweetie, now the old ladys are all creepy old men," he says softly. I grin at him.
"I feel like I'm trying to find the right dress though," I continue.
"I've never been dress shopping."
"Good, I'll take you."
"Hello!"
I jump as a woman rushes over and kisses me on both cheeks. Her man follows, somewhat more subdued.
"Oh, hi," I say as they sit down opposite us.
"I'm Lucy and this is Cameron!" she says, "oh, I'm so excited!"
I smile, liking the look of these two much more.
"I'm Amber and this is Darren," I reply, "it's nice to meet you."
"We're so glad we can do this!" Lucy says, "we've wanted a baby ever since we got married! We found out recently that I have a barren womb, but we thought, 'well then, we'll adopt'! And so here we are!"
"How old are you?" Darren asks.
"I'm twenty-seven," Cameron says, "and Luce is twenty-five."
"And you're both seventeen?" Lucy asks. We nod in response. She gasps and shakes her head.
"You're so brave!" she cries, grabbing my hands in both of hers, "I'm so glad you're doing this!"
After an hour of talking with Cameron and Lucy, Darren and I are sold.
"I suppose we'll see you in a few months!" Lucy says, giving me a huge hug, "thank you again!"
"Well, that went well," Darren says as we head home. I nod, absentmindedly.
I'm glad my baby will have a good home.
I am.
Really.
