Jealousy is Love's Best Friend (Book 1)

Chapter 9

Life can't be better for the five young Gryffindors. They are happy and in love (most of them at least) and have nothing to worry about. Then trouble creeps up on them from behind them like criminals in the night and their happiness whisked away.

It starts on a normal, unsuspecting day. Remus and Sirius are first to rise and after their usual good morning kiss and cuddle, they head down to breakfast. Aside from the few homophobic comments which by now they were sadly used to, it is fairly uneventful.

Then comes the mail.

The Black family owl drops a small envelope in front of Sirius, and from his many experiences with that particular type of letter (mainly after pranks with James), he immediately recognises it as a howler. 

"Bloody hell," grimaces Sirius and tightly grips Remus's hand.

"SIRIUS BLACK!" It explodes. The entire hall turns to face them. "HOW DARE YOU BRING SUCH DISHONOR ON THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK? WE ARE ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED! A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP WITH ANOTHER MAN? A GRYFFINDOR NO LESS. WE WILL NOT TOLERATE SUCH FILTH AS HOMOSEXUALITY IN THIS FAMILY. WE ARE ASHAMED THAT YOU CALL YOURSELF A BLACK! THIS IS ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING BEHAVIOUR! WE EXPECT YOU TO SEVER TIES WITH THIS YOUNG MAN IMMEDIATELY, OR YOU WILL NEVER SEE HOGWARTS OR YOUR SILLY LITTLE FRIENDS AGAIN!"

And then letter tears itself to shreds. Remus stares uncomfortably at his hands, not saying a word. Sirius is furious. How did they even find out? The Slytherins are laughing and in the middle of them, laughing the loudest, is the answer. Regulus.

"I'm going to murder him."

***

Sirius heads back to the astronomy tower. It has become something of a habit for him, to go there when he is angry or needs to think. He convinces himself that the head clearing fresh air and beautiful scenery are why he goes up there, but deep down he knows the real reason. So no one will see him cry. He hates vulnerability, he hates being weak, yet his family always finds a way to make him feel like that. He had been so stupid, so blind, to think that anything could ever be this perfect. He would usually enjoy the thrill of contradicting his parent's values in this way, but it was serious this time.

The howler had said that if he didn't end his relationship with Remus, he would be pulled out of Hogwarts. He knows that his parents will carry out that threat, which Sirius can't even begin to comprehend. Without Hogwarts he has nothing. All his friends and happy memories are here, everything he ever loved. He leans against the railing and cries out, the wind carrying the sound. He can feel the tears of frustration running tracks down his cheeks and he angrily wipes them away.

He knows how Regulus works. He will always be on the lookout for clues of Sirius's relationship and have his slimy, Slytherin friends playing spy, and probably a few of the other houses too. This means that their relationship would be confined to the few hours that they spend in their dorm, away from prying eyes. He can't deal with that. What's the point in if all the time they can get together is a few hours a day?

He digs the heels of his hands into his eyes. He hates crying. Ever since he was young he was told that crying is for weak people and wimps. He know that that is not true, but he still feels so pathetic. Weak.

***

Remus doesn't know what to do. As soon as the howler stops, Sirius stands up, pale faced and silent, and runs walks out the hall. The Slytherins laugh but everyone else just stares at Remus, too scared to say anything. Remus feels like he is going to be sick. He runs out of the hall towards the dormitory, ignoring all the people that try and talk to him. Once he in the dormitory he flings himself down on the bed. He feels like he should cry but the tears won't come. Instead he just feels hollow, the shell of what once was a person.

He remembers the time that Sirius and James had burnt a Slytherin scarf and graffitied "Slytherins are Satan" on the wall. That summer they hadn't seen anything of Sirius and he had come back to school covered in scars and bruises. Remus can't imagine the pain of losing him and can't even begin to think what the Blacks would do to him behind closed doors. The last time it had been a small hate prank. This time it was uprooting one the family honours and values and betraying the beliefs of their pureblood mania. Eventually the pain of contemplation becomes so overwhelming that it begins to seep away entirely, leaving Remus feeling empty. The shell of what once was a person.

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Shock! Horror! Drama!

But yeah, Wolfstar guys. Sorry!!!!!!

This isn't my normal uploading day but I'm going away this weekend and I don't get back until Monday. I was going to update on Monday but I have time now so yay! This is for you Allie and Ella, you can stop going on about my update schedule now!1!11!!!!!1111!!!!1!11

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