Every Breath She Takes [CURRENTLY ON HOLD]

Chapter 5: Revelations

The gentle man scared me. He scared me more than my kidnapper. I knew that was strange, but it was true. At least with my kidnapper, I knew what he wanted. He wanted money. That was the reason he’s kidnapped me, and Duchess, and the other girls. The gentle man, however, clearly didn’t. He was paying to use us – me – but there was something about him that I couldn’t put my finger on. He just scared me.

Time passed, again both slowly and quickly. My pain tolerance grew, until the beatings that I received no longer made me scream, but they still hurt. I became covered in small scars from the buckle of his belt, and seem to permanently have a swollen lip, and be covered in bruises. Always, my body hurt, both inside and out.

The group in the garden changed. Girls disappeared, and a couple of girls arrived, but they didn’t stay for long. I dreaded to think what he’d done to them, and hoped that they, at least, were free of pain.

After what I thought was a couple of months, there came a time in the garden that I remember vividly. He had begun to trust us somewhat, for we were no longer bound when we were in the garden, and he didn’t watch us. For us all, it was our one chance to be ourselves again, and to not worry about angering a man.

On this morning, I’d been the first to be pushed into the overgrown garden. Almost immediately, I started to retch, and I ran to a bush, hiding behind it while what had been a meagre breakfast reversed its route. When I was done, I felt hands steadying me, and looked up into Duchess’ lovely face.

“Thank you,” I murmured, and shakily got to my feet. Her gaze was contemplative, and I looked at her curiously. “What?”

She shook her head slightly. “It’s taken so long,” she finally said. “We all thought…”

It hit me then. I was pregnant. I staggered, and she caught me.

“Smoky? It’s alright. Come, sit down.”

I did, and she sat next to me, letting me lean into her. When I felt I could talk again, I looked at her. “What did you think?”

She hesitated, just as his voice rang out.

“Duchess!”

For once, though, she didn’t obey him. She stayed with me, looking into my eyes. “We thought you were barren,” she murmured. “We knew it was a blessing in disguise.”

His voice rang out again, growing angrier. “Duchess!”

I put my hand on her arm. “So you’ve all…?”

She nodded. “I had three,” she said. “Each time, he took them from me when they were weaned. I haven’t seen them since.”

I felt a pang for her. “How did you end up here?”

She would have answered, had he not come upon us. He was furious, and we both quailed from him. He ignored me, grabbing Duchess’ short hair and dragging her away. I felt cold, knowing that she would be punished.

It was quiet in the garden for a while after that, an illusion of peace. In reality, we were all terrified. I joined the other girls, but didn’t talk, thinking about what I knew. I knew it would be impossible to know who the father was, yet I found myself hoping – foolishly, I knew – that it would be the gentle man. My thoughts were interrupted by our kidnapper, as he came to the back door again.

“Smoky!”

I looked over, and began to walk towards him. When I was still a fair way away, I caught sight of Duchess, who was standing behind him. She was battered and there was a cut on her temple that was oozing blood, and I could tell that her lip had been split as well. All of a sudden, a rage came over me, and I flew at him, throwing myself at him, hands raised to strike him. His reflexes were up to scratch, though, and he brought his knee up in time to stop me. I hit it in the pit of my stomach, and dropped like a stone, nearly unconscious. He dragged me through the house to my room, and tossed me inside, going out again. I lay there, gasping for breath, stupidly hoping I hadn’t lost the baby. For some reason, I wanted it. I wanted to keep the baby, even knowing that it would be impossible to know who the father was.

When he came back, he was livid with rage. I had managed to get myself onto the bed, but he promptly pulled me off. I crashed to the floor, knocking my head against the wooden bed frame, and saw stars for a few moments. He took advantage of my momentary stunned state to push me against the wall, reefing my shirt up. He thrust his fingers inside me, and I cried out in pain, writhing, trying to get away. He’d pinned me to the wall, though, and I was helpless. He thrust deeper and harder, and then twisted. I shuddered, and went limp. My vision was swimming, and black dots were dancing before my eyes. He leaned in close, his voice tickling my ear.

“Don’t you ever try that again, bitch,” he hissed. I tried to jerk away, but his grip in me tightened, and I stilled. “Or this will seemed like a caress. You understand?”

I nodded fearfully, hoping that was what he wanted. It was, and he let me drop to the floor and left. I curled around myself, and placed my hands on my still-flat stomach.

“Hello,” I whispered. Something changed then, and I knew for sure that I was pregnant. I could feel the baby, and made it – and me – a vow. I would get out of here.