Behind The Mask

I'm Falling To Far

  I open my eyes, blinking once, twice, thrice. I sit up.

Where the hell am I?

Oh that's right, in the alley, sleeping. Sometimes I question my thinking.. WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING?!

Just calm down..

OK. I suddenly notice deep cuts on my wrist, I'll have to bandage those up when I get home. And hopefully, no one sees me.

I ran, yeah, a pretty stupid move. I needed to get away. Away from everything. My blade. My escape. I need to get home as soon as possible.

"Hey! It's her it's Alina Black!" I hear.

Crap...

"OMG, can I have your autograph?"

"I'm a huge fan!'

"Can I get a picture?"

Blinding light blinds me all the sudden. I raise my hands towards my eyes.

Uh oh. Paparazzi!

Ughh! They basically ruin my life, just like everything else! I..can't..no! N-not now!

That's when I just break. I burst into tears then I ran.

I ran as fast as my legs could run. Tears streaming down my face, I can't not now. I need to get away from everyone and everything. Away from life. I ran as if my life depended on , though it really did. I made it home without the paparazzi seeing me or my scars. Thankfully. Now time to face home ,not the best place in the world. Though it's not like I have any other choice. I just ran up the stairs ,two at a time, to my room.
  I looked for my razor box frantically. It's under the mattress I run with it in my hand to the bathroom.

One cut, two cuts, three cuts and more.
I smile as I see the blood drip to the floor. My moment of release lasts for a while then I clean my arm and wrap it for the night.

      I lay in bed as I think why is my life like this. People say I have fame, best life ever but in reality it the worst. You loose true friends and gain fake ones. Those fake friends only want to be your friend because of money and one rumor. Trust me, it can completely ruin your life. I lay in bed and think what if I had done it years ago.
Nobody wouldn't have to suffer.

   Why can't I do it now?

Well if I do my family would be ruined and broken.

But they don't care about you why would you care .

    That's it, my life is horrible I had to change my name so no one would remember the girl in all black in the corner.
The girl who showed her scars to the guy she thought she loved.
  Well guess what? He told everyone. The love of her life, at least she thought he was.
  The girl who was sent to the hospital because she overdosed on her  anti- depressant pills.
The girl who never stood up for herself . Both her and the new me were going to be gone by next month.

   I know it.

______________________________________________________________
  Sorry for not updating I (Chipisasom) had no inspiration and I had to write this one so I put it off. But something big is gonna happen soon so stay with us.