The Beast I Have Become

Chapter 10

        "So, Jack knows about your...uh, 'condition'?" Matt asks me after I told him what we did.
        "Yep," I reply. "He's a born wolf though. He said that it runs in his family. Compared to me, I was bitten."
        "Well, it could've been worse," Ryan says. I glare at him.
        "How so?" I growl, not meaning to. Ryan slightly raises his eyebrows but does nothing to respond.
        "Well," Ryan continues. "You could've been dead." I glare and mumble under my breath.
        "Maybe death would've been better for me," Ryan must've heard me because he growls and gets in my face. Matt only frowns and crosses his arms over his small chest.
        "Well," Ryan growls. "Look at-at...Daniel. He k-killed himself and look what it's done to me. To you. To all of his fans and friends! And now here you go saying that it would be better if you killed yourself?!"
        "I-I'm sorry. I wasn't th-," I get cut off. I kinda expected that.
        "Mark!" He yells. "Just imagine all of the fans you'll disappoint. The broken hearts you'll cause. Mark, fans have said that your videos have saved them and sometimes their lives. Some aren't even here anymore, and you know that!" He's right. He's right on so many levels. I've even said the last part myself. This isn't like me. This isn't like me at all.
        "Mark," Matt replies while pushing Ryan back to calm him down. "That isn't like you. I don't know if it is the wolf, but don't let it take over your thoughts. You know how touchy that subject is. To Ryan especially." Ryan glances at Matt and right back at me.
        "I'm sorry," I say to both. "I wasn't in my right state of mind. I don't know what the hell came over me. *sigh* I think I just need some rest. I'm tired." And with that, I head upstairs and sit on the edge of my bed. I sit on the edge of my bed and suddenly get very very mad at myself.
        "Goddammit!" I growl while giving myself a facepalm. "You're such an idiot, Mark! Suicide?! Are you fucking kidding right now?! Ryan's right! Just imagine all of the fans that would mentally die if I killed myself. Look at what happened with D-Daniel. You can barely say his name without tears building in your eyes." I become momentarily sad, but that grief quickly evaporates into a steaming rage again. My hands ball up and I become so mad that I literally have no idea what to do. Punch the wall? Jesus, with my strength, if I punch the wall, I'll for sure bust a hole through it.
        I'm sure that Matt and Ryan can hear me growling to myself, but I think they just don't wanna come in a face me. Dammit! I'm usually calmer than this. Keeping my cool is so fucking hard! Fuck! I would text Jack for help, but it's probably nighttime. Well, that guy's like a vampire, he never seems to be asleep. But even if I do try to text him, I might easily snap my phone in half. My hand muscles are tense and still doubled into fists.
        Get your shit together, Mark, I thought to myself as I take a deep breath. You can't cost the lives of your friends...or your room. I look around at my messy room. I have clothes on the floor and the bed is a mess. Fuck, I'm such a damn slob. I'll get it later. Then, wave after wave of anger crashes over me and my body gets hots. Very hot. I feel like I'm burning from the inside out and I take my shirt off and run my fingers through my hair. My breathing becomes faster and shallow, my head starting to spin.
        "Oh dammit!" I say to myself. "No! Th-this can't be happening! It isn't even a full moon! Fuck!" I get up as best I can, my vision blurry. My glasses must've fallen off because they definitely aren't on my face. I rush downstairs surprisingly without falling down them and get the attention of Matt who is currently in the kitchen. He curses and helps me down to the basement and gets me tied down.

Matt's POV

I get Mark tied down. As I slip some chain around his neck, his small snout starts to stretch. He still halfway transforms, and I'm pretty sure this doesn't count on the first three big transformations. I then notice a small tail. He has a pretty long tail to be honest, but it looks more a rat tail than anything else due to the lack of fur.
        "Eh," I say when I see it. It's definitely a part of him, and it's pretty real. "That's not right." I decide to watch and I tell Ryan too since he's only in his room. I told Ryan to stay upstairs in case I was in danger and he needed to call 911 or something. Mark doesn't breakthrough, but in a few good long minutes, he stops and breaths. He looks at me, his eyes their regular light brown.
        "Mark?" I ask to see if it's really him. He nods his head with a small grunt. He looks at himself as his body gradually starts to change back. It ends with him on his knees, panting heavily. "Damn, transforming sure takes a lot out of you."
        "Ya," he replies. "It takes a lot of involuntary energy to get the son of bitch to change. Jesus."
        "Did Sean ever talk to you about this kind of situation?" I ask since Mark did tell us how him and Sean talked about werewolves.
        "Yeah," Mark replies, now getting his breath. "It was rage. Something he, Goddammit, warned me about! He said that it would be a bitch to control." I can tell that he's getting upset, he's starting to double his hands again.
        "Whoa there, buddy," I reply while putting my hand on his hot ass shoulder. "Calm down. Just calm down. This isn't your fault and you can't do a damned thing about it. Calm down." Mark calms down a bit when I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
        "Yeah, you're right," he replies, his shouldered slouching. "I need to calm down. I gotta get my shit together. Jack said that he's gonna try to come over before one of the full moons so that he can help train me and transform together with me."
        "Hm," I reply with a nod. "That's a good idea. We should totally get together and all of us plan it out some time. For a bunch of goofballs, you guys make a good team."
        "Whatever," Mark says while punching me 'lightly'. "Oh sorry. I don't know my own strength anymore." I just chuckle, showing him that it's cool. He smiles along and runs his fingers through his hair. He gets up and walks out, but runs into the doorframe. He still doesn't have his glasses.
        "Hey, Matt," he calls. "Come with me so I don't step on my glasses." I nod, come up, and guide him when he needs it and I grab his glasses before he steps on them.