Bad Boys Can't Love

Exes and Hoes

If you haven't, please read my lame excuse on the conversations part of my profile haha, enjoy! Vote and comment please, xoxo -Annie
   I could lie. I could say that I've been to a party before, and just didn't enjoy it. I could say that I've been to a few, and they weren't really my scene, which I why I don't go to any anymore. Or I could be honest.
I've never been to a party. Unless Chuckie Cheese when I was six counts.
I just have never been invited, and I've never had anyone to go with. No one has ever asked me to go to a party with them, actually that's a lie. Kayla asked me once but it was to some college party. I refused, and thank god because three girls went missing that day and one girl was drugged. Kayla, thank god, didn't go since I didn't.
So, obviously I was nervous, and taken back when the question came up. I mean, I wasn't prepared, and I'm still not! What happened to us just arguing over whether Asher was better looking than Taylor Lautner or not?
"Want to go to Logan Kendall's party on Friday?" Asher asks. Logan is some jock who's the party animal at my school. If there was a wildest party, it would probably be his. "What?! No!" I shriek nervously. "It's just a party. It will be fun. Come on, everyone loves parties." Asher says like it's obvious. "I've never been to one." I admit. He gasps, "Wait, what? I knew you were a good girl but even the biggest goody two shoes go to parties!" I roll my eyes, "Not me."
"Well then. I'm glad to be your first party buddy." Asher smiles. "I went to a Chuckie Cheese party once." I remind him. "Trust me, high school parties are not like Chuckie Cheese. But you'll love it." He says. I nod. I guess I'm going.

Friday

I'm nervous. Really nervous. My neighbor who's twenty, Callie, is here to help. We're kind of close, we've had sleepovers and stuff since I was little. Callie is the big sister that I've never had. She sure knows how to present me for a party.
"This is so exciting! Little Sarah is growing up!" Callie squeals. She ruffles my hair, then flattens it as she looks at me in the mirror. "Okay. Makeup, then clothes, then hair." Callie tells me, a grin spread across her face. She takes out a huge makeup kit that she brought with her. "Not to much." I tell her, worrying that she'll cake it on. "Trust me, Sar. I won't put on too much, you are too beautiful for cakey makeup." She says. Then, before I can say anything, she gets to work.

Okay, her work is stunning. I have on light foundation and concealer, lightly covering my imperfections. A light but shiny smokey eyeshadow makes my blue eyes pop, the mascara and eyeliner making them look bigger. Blush and bronzer makes me look actually healthy, instead of pale and dead. Lastly, pink glossy lipstick makes my lips look plump and full. "It's amazing!" I smile, hugging her. "You look great!" Callie says happily and proud.
The outfit seems like hardest part for me, but the easiest for Callie. She chooses my outfit, and I can't help but agree. It's perfect, and I'm shocked that I never really wore it. I must have forgotten about it in the back of my closet.
A strapless deep blue dress that comes down to my knees is picked out for me. It has a sweetheart neckline and hugs me in all the right places. It has a jeweled ring around the tight fitting waist line. I can't believe I'm about to admit this, but I look beautiful. It goes with the blue clutch and black heels I wear. I top it off with a pretty silver necklace that I had gotten on my sixteenth birthday. I smile happily, who knew getting ready could be so fun?
My hair is curled into perfect loops that rest on my back. A small pearly white diamond encrusted clip pushes the front strands of my hair to the side. "You don't need to waste such a nice clip on me- I'll end up losing it or-" I begin to protest, but Callie stops me. "It's okay. It's yours. I'll never wear it anyway. It's gorgeous on you." Callie insists. I go to protest more, but I'm stopped by Asher behind me in the mirror.
"We're all done here. You must be Asher, I'm Callie. I'll be going now. Have fun, Sarah!" She calls as she quickly leaves.
Asher is wearing a white button down and really really nice jeans. His black dress shoes make me laugh, making me miss his converse. "Am I overdressed?" I ask. "Nah, you see, girls dress up to these parties and guys underdress." He explains. I nod casually. "You look stunning." He exclaims. A light pink tints his cheeks, and he thinks that I don't notice it. Who knew that bad boys could blush? "Thanks!" I smile. He holds my hand and leads me to his red mustang.
     I get it, and watch as the car begins to move. Asher is next to me, and everything feels perfect. I know that this party will be everything I hope for, the amazing and unforgettable highschool party I've dreamt of my entire life.
   "Whatcha thinking bout?" Asher asks playfully. "Nothing much- just what the party will be like." I say. He seems amused by my lack of party knowledge. What can I say? I've been an anti social little book nerd my entire life.
   See, I'm pretty sure I beat Asher completely when it comes to academics, no competition, but when it comes to social interactions, Asher might as well be Einstein.
   "We're here." Asher tells me after a while of silence. Not bad silence, not awkward silence. Happy silence. Silence filled by the content feeling that fills me and hopefully him. We don't need to say anything to each other to understand that we are both happy.
    I look up, and my stomach lurches. Did I mention that I literally fear anything nearly social? I was excited, but now I'm just scared. Terrified, actually. I feel like running away screaming like the little girl I am inside. A giant house booms and shakes with electronic, bland music, and people talk in the front yard. I see lights flashing from inside and hear the chatter of a million voices. Red solo cups litter the entire front yard.
    Asher opens the door for me, and helps me out. "Woah." Is all I can manage to say. "Yeah." Asher laughs casually, running his hand through his hair.
   As we enter, I notice people dancing really close to each other, and everyone has a drink in their hands. The place is packed with more drunk teens than I can count.
     My heart races, and I stay close to Asher in the crowded scene. What people refer to as hoes are everywhere- dancing against guys and wearing skirts that in my opinion are too short to even count as underwear. Some of them pretend to be drunk, when it's obvious that they aren't. What's the big deal with that? If you are intoxicated, than you are, if you're not, than you're not. Don't pretend to be tipsy when you haven't taken a sip out of your drink yet.
   Then, I see Adam. It takes me back, shocks me really. Adam- the geeky boy who's never been drunk before. The goody two shoes who would never be caught dead near anything close to a party. Or so I thought.
  Kayla's with him, no surprise there. My ex boyfriend and ex best friend in one place with me. This party is just full of exes and hoes.
  Adam seems completely hammered, and Kayla is being an idiot and acting drunk. I don't know why I was ever her friend in the first place. She just flings herself at boys. I wonder what type of drunk Adam is, the angry, mean, sad, flirty, clumsy, etc.
    Kayla seems to be trying to flirt with him, but he's not having it. He pushes her off of him and stands up. I guess I can cross flirty off the list.
   Then, he notices me staring at him. He looks so pissed when he sees Asher. Asher then sees what I'm looking at.
Adam angrily marches towards us, shoving dancing people out of his way. When he gets to us, he looks more furious than I've ever seen him.
   "You. Ruin my relationship! How dare you even go near her after that!" Adam yells at Asher. I guess he's the angry drunk. This escalated really quickly. Everyone is looking at us, as I glance around nervously. Asher seems angry too, but I hold his hard to keep him calm. "Look, man. I did nothing, Sarah and I are just here to have a good time." Asher says through a clenched jaw and gritted teeth. A good time. Apparently my wishes for an awesome first party experience are down the drain.
     "You-" Adam begins to spit again at Asher, but I cut him off, "Adam. Please leave us alone." He remembers that I'm there, and his face softens. His muscles relax and he looks at me, his green eyes glinting. "Oh, Sarah. I love you. I always had, just never had the guts to say it. But, I love you so much. More than the world and-" Adam begins rambling. Scratch that, he's an emotional- mood swing drunk. "Adam. Please, I told you. We are better apart. You deserve a good girl who can love you the way you love others. You have a big heart." I tell him. He seems hurt, and I know that I will always care about Adam. I also know that Asher means more.
    "Sarah, I'll make it up to you! I'll-" He tries again, but once more, I stop him. "You have nothing to make up for. You were a wonderful boyfriend, so many girls would die to have you. It's me. I just don't want to be with you. I'm sorry." I say meaningfully.
  Asher is just standing here, silent. He probably is surprised, or feels awkward. I don't blame him. He always thought that I still clung to Adam, and here I am, proving him wrong.
  Adam just walks away. I don't know what he's feeling. I don't know what he's thinking. There's no way for me to tell. He just walks away from the conversation, and my heart aches. I feel bad for him, I wish that I can love him the way he loves me, but I just don't. He's sweet and will forever mean something to me, but I don't love him. He walks out the door of both the party and my life.
   I feel emotionless. Shouldn't I be sad? Adam wasn't only my boyfriend, but my childhood best friend. But then I realize why I'm not curled up in a little ball on the floor, crying. I have Asher to make everything okay and to keep me happy. I don't depend on Adam anymore, I'm not close to him at all anymore. I close to Asher. I depend on Asher.
   He rubs my back and pulls me close to him. I don't mind, I need the comfort. "Are you okay?" He whispers into my ear, his honey voice barely audible with the booming music. I nod. I am okay. I'm fine.
   I look at Asher. "Let's enjoy this." I say finally, managing a smile. Once he smiles back, mine becomes real. I give him the biggest grin as I pull him onto the dance floor.
   Asher and I are so close to each other as we move to the beat of the fast paced music. I dance with him like I've never danced before. I've always considered myself as having two left feet, but he's such a great lead, we don't miss a beat. It's nice knowing that even if I tried to, I can't mess up this feeling. It's exhilarating. The song ends.
   I am sweating from all of the people stuffed into the room around me. "Fresh air." I mouth to him, and he nods. I walk out the door with Asher following close behind me.
   "You're a really good dancer." I smile. "I know." He said confidently, "I've had a few lessons." I'm surprised, I never thought of him as the dance class taking type. "I was five. And my parents- never mind." He begins to confess, than stops, a sad look forming on his face. I turn his face with my hand to face me. A hand on his cheek, I say, "Hey, you know you can tell me anything, right?" He looks at me, a bit confused. I feel like he's never had anyone that he could actually talk to. I feel like this is all new to him.
He studies my face and finally says, "I shouldn't bother you with my-" I cut him off. "It wouldn't bother me. I always bombard you with my problems, so I just want you to know that if you ever need to talk, I'm here." He begins to smile, and then nods subtly. Maybe I'm getting through to the bad boy.
   We decide to leave after a bit more dancing and talking. Getting into his mustang, I turn to him. "Thank you." I say. He looks at me, his eyebrows knit together, "For what?" I think about this, how to explain it. "For the amazing night, and mostly for staying calm when Adam was being..." I trail off. He nods, and we drive off, our hands intertwined.