Niam One Shots

7- Tombstone

7- Tombstone

(Niall's POV):

I stepped into the cemetery with a heavy heart. This was my first time visiting him since the accident. I couldn't handle it at first, but could you blame me? We were supposed to get married in three months.

I understand that I should've visited him sooner since it has been two months since that night, but I'm scared. I'm scared that I will see his grave and break out in tears..I'm scared of the memories I'll get of his lifeless body. I'm scared of how in love with him I am, and he's not here to be with me.

I twisted the silver band on my ring finger, taking it off and looking at the engraving on the inside.

"My heart beats for you" I released a shaky breath, pulling my winter coat tighter around myself. I walked up to the tombstone and sat directly above where he was laid out.

"Hey, Liam." I started out, running a hand through my hair.

"I miss you." I said shakily.

"I really fucking miss you." I stared at nothing, zoning out.

"I was just thinking the other day about the first time we met..high school had always been a tough time for me, especially since my parents had been going through a divorce.

When I moved from Ireland I was really vulnerable..especially since I moved to a city as large as London. I have never been the cheeriest person, you know that. Hell, you had to put up with me all these years..running to the store to pick up my prescription drug to control my behavior." I chuckled to myself, and I felt a stir in the air..almost as if Liam were laughing along with me.

"It is unfortunate we didn't discover I was bi-polar sooner...it would have saved us from so many mood swings and dramatic exits by me. God, you're so perfect to have put up with all that.

It was that day when I met you that my life took a turn for the better. I was one of those kids suffering from manic depression and you were the light at the end of the tunnel. In a way I'm so glad I spilled the contents of my bag all over the hallway, otherwise I wouldn't have met you." I sniffled, remembering vividly the way he looked at me longer than usual after he handed me my books.

"The first time I saw you was a wake-up call, a reminder that there was still good in the world. Standing here today, I'm not sure why the only thing good in the world was taken from me. Why would God do this to me?" The tears started flowing then, and I wiped my eyes on the sleeve of my jacket.

I had to stop speaking for a few minutes, focusing on getting my hands to stop shaking. The more I thought about the fact I was sitting on my lover's tombstone, the harder it became to breathe.

"The first year with you w-was g-great." I gasped in a breath, before releasing it. "We w-were only f-friends then, we had no idea we would e-end up in love." My hoarse voice had raised a few octaves as my composure quickly deteriorated.

"The second year...a-at your family's New Years party, when you a-asked me if you could k-kiss me...I knew at t-that moment that.." I inhaled sharply again, my lungs desperate for oxygen. With another scrub at my eyes, I opened my mouth again.

"I knew at that moment that I l-loved you...and that I w-wanted to be with you." My entire body was trembling by now, and I pulled my knees up to my chest while my arms hugged them to me.

"The next years were even more amazing..going t-through college, o-on dates. I remember how shy you were, our first t-time together...you were so careful with m-me, as if I would break with your w-weight on top of me." I laughed at the memory, tears still pouring down my face.

I stared into the distance, recalling exactly how it felt when he trailed his fingers down my stomach, the hairs there sticking straight up at his appearance.

"I m-miss you so fucking m-much, Liam. The only reason I'm s-still alive is because I kn-know you'd be so hurt if I took my life...but I want nothing more than t-to be with you again..." I gasped for air, as I seemed to be doing a lot today.

A sharp pain went through my chest, making me clutch my hands to my heart. It felt like my heart was being torn apart in two, shreds of it falling to pieces. It suddenly kick started at an unhealthy rate and I realized what was happening.

This didn't happen often, and Liam had always been there to help me through it. As the panic attack became more and more intense, I felt the oxygen to my brain become less and less. I thought I saw Liam sitting next to me, taking me into his arms and uncurling my balled up body like he used to do.

"L-Liam I'm scared," I choked out, my body becoming rigid. My eyes shifted erratically, trying to focus on the figure beside me.

"Are you real?" I asked, lifting a hand to touch the figure's face.

"I love you Niall..I'm so proud of you. You're so strong, so beautiful...I'm sorry I can't be with you, but we will meet again some day. Some day. I'll be waiting for you." He whispered, putting his cold hand over mine on his cheek.

My body was trembling, trying to make sense of the situation. Tears left my eyes, and a shiver ran through my body as I stroked his cheek. A broken sob left my mouth and I hugged him tightly, never wanting to let go. He pulled back from me before smiling up at the sky.

"I have to go now. I promise I'll see you again. I love you." He pressed a lingering kiss to my forehead before taking my hands and kissing each knuckle. He finally took my engagement ring to his lips and pressed a tender kiss there, keeping eye contact with me. Tears stained my cheeks but I kept my eyes wide open, taking in his beauty just as he was when I last saw him.

His fingers ran over my eyelids, shutting them, and my mind was filled with a vision of us standing in the wedding altar. I smiled at the scene, and watched it play out in my head. We kissed as our family cheered on, and walked out of the church to their applause. I opened my eyes as a breeze went past me, and Liam was not there anymore.

Fresh tears instantly fell down my cheeks again, and I buried my head in my knees, trying to get air in my body. I rocked myself back and forth for 20 minutes until the clinking against stone caught my attention. I pulled my head up to look at Liam's tombstone to find a silver band with diamonds and words engraved on the inside.

I curiously picked it up, curious to know where it came from. I examined the ring closely, looking at the words on the inside. some day, it read. I gasped, remembering the words Liam had told me earlier, deciding I must not have been hallucinating.

I slipped the ring on my finger next to my engagement band, noticing it was my size. I looked up toward the sky I'm awe, knowing Liam was looking back down on me. I brought my fingers to my lips, pressing a kiss before blowing it up toward him, knowing that's what always made him giggle. The wind blew past again, faintly carrying the sound of his beautiful laughter. I smile at that, missing it. I sat for countless hours after that, just talking to his tombstone.

People walked by, giving sympathetic looks once they saw the bands on my finger but I ignored them. I talked to his tombstone until it got dark, when Harry came looking for me.

"Niall? Are you okay? You've been here since lunch, dinner's passed." He said, kneeling down next to me.
"I'm fine..I'm ready to come home though." I said, accepting the hand he offered me. As we walked off, I paused to look back at Liam's grave.

"I love you." I whispered quietly. The wind gently swept my messy hair out of my eyes, much like Liam used to do. I smiled, turning around to catch up with Harry.

-

this one's sad and maybe not the most appropriate one shot to put up on Liam's birthday! *nervous laughter*

Well, that is it my loves! How'd you like it? Do you think there's anything I should improve on? Let me know in the comments below!

Also, Happy Birthday to Liam! Ugh I hate saying that, can be stop growing up and be cute and little again?