17- Dear Niall (Grow Old With Me)

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Warning: Major character death.

Do not read unless you listen to the song. Then listen to it again because it's AMAZING WOWWWW.

17- Dear Niall (Grow Old With Me)

Dear Niall,

What happened to us? You said you'd grow old with me..

Liam couldn't sleep. Empty bottles of sleeping pills could pile around and taunt him, but no, he still wouldn't sleep.

I'd like to say I'm okay, but I'm not. You got your peace now, but what about me?

He stared at the ceiling with tears in his eyes that refused to flow. The clock read 2:36 am. Where did he go wrong? What did he do? They were just about to be married, move into a big house together. They had their life planned out before them.

I can't sleep without you here. The bed is empty, the room quiet without your small breaths filling it up. Maybe I should be angry, shouldn't I? You left me, Niall. Do you understand how hard it was to come home to your cold body?

Liam hated how he couldn't be angry. He was confused; why did he leave Liam by himself? He should be angry at Niall for leaving him without an explanation, but mostly he was just sad. Sad. How pathetic he feels, like he doesn't have a meaning anymore.

We had plans, I thought we had the time--had our lives. Forever you said. Now you'll never get older. I feel like I'm frozen in time, just getting colder and colder, Niall. God, you've left me wrecked.

Zayn knocked on his bedroom door prepared to wake him the next morning as the sun rose, but Liam was still staring at that ceiling.

"Liam?" he whispered, sitting by the boy's feet.

"Yeah?" his wrecked voice replied, eyes not moving from their spot.

"You need to eat something, mate. The funeral is today. Did you finish your letter to put into Niall's coffin?" Zayn's careful voice twisted between them like vines, as Zayn didn't want to start the boy's tears up again.

"Yeah, I did. It's on the table." Was all he got. Zayn sighed in defeat and went to grab the paper and leave. As he began to shut the door behind him, Liam's voice made him stop in his tracks.

"I miss him so much, Zee."

Zayn didn't say another word as he walked back to the boy's side and comforted him. He got him showered and fed once he calmed down, which the other boys were grateful for. Nobody had a friendship quite like Zayn and Liam, where very few words were required.

Please tell me what I'm supposed to do now. I've been wearing your engagement ring. I know it was for you to wear forever, but I told them not to bury you with it. I just couldn't let them take it, yanno? I guess you don't know. I don't even know, myself.

Liam had to excuse himself from the church. He couldn't even walk up to Niall's coffin for God sake, just staring at the open casket at the end of the isle hurt him.

He was supposed to watch as Niall walked down this very isle in a nice suit with a huge smile, a smile that meant this was it, they were getting married.

Instead of that, Liam was to walk down that very isle in a nice suit with heavy heart.

We were one, we were golden. I've gone cold without you, I just need you right now. I need to feel your warm skin, I need you to tell me you love me.

More tears escaped his eyes as he watched his best friends put their final items into the casket at the opposite end of the church. That's where Liam was to put his letter he wrote. They were the last items that would be with him forever, their final goodbyes.

Then he would help as they sealed the coffin, never to be opened again. Just like that, the last time he'd see his lover's face.

I just miss you, Niall. I don't know how to go on without you, you were the air in my lungs.

"Are you coming in Liam? They're going to start the service soon." Zayn said, suddenly right in front of Liam.

He nodded his head slowly, taking a seat beside Niall's mother without another glance at the open casket. He couldn't, not yet.

During the service, warm tears were flowing at a constant rate. It wasn't until a slideshow started of Niall's life started playing, starting from his childhood and working it's way up to the first picture they took together that he lost it. More pictures showed, their prom pictures, graduation pictures, college pictures even. Next was a picture taken when Liam proposed, showing tears on Niall's cheeks as Liam looked up at the boy with pure love in his eyes.

Noisy sobs filled the church, and people turned from their seats on the benches to see Liam's head cradled in the arms of Maura. She bit her lip to stop her own tears as she shushed her son-in-law, at least that's what she had always referred to him as. Liam's cries shook his body, breaking the hearts of the guests as they looked away politely.

The engagement ring on his finger hadn't gone unnoticed as he finally walked up to the open casket. His bottom lip trembled in time with his hands as he looked at the body in the coffin. The entire church was silent, watching his actions. Though he stood alone at the front of the church, Zayn stood with the Harry and Louis, ready to go to Liam's side if needed.

"Oh, Niall." Liam crooned out sadly, running his fingers along the cold hand that was positioned with a rosary in his fingers. His body was frozen solid, cold from the freezer it was preserved in. A single thick tear fell from his cheek, landing on the fabric around the coffin and he wiped his face with the back of his hand. After a sniffle and a bite of his lip to stop the trembling, he stuck the letter he wrote into the side of Niall's coffin. "I love you so much. I wish you were here, alive and hugging me."

The tears started again, and this time making his heart race and his shoulders twitch. Zayn, Harry, and Louis walked up to him and wrapped him in a hug. They hugged as Niall's parents walked up with Greg and they all closed the coffin together. Never to be opened again.

You left me here behind. What happened to us, Niall? You said you'd grow old with me.

I love you Niall, more than I love myself. I'll see you one day, baby.

Liam. x

15 December 2013

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.....guys, I cried twice writing that.

Hey, super duper huge happy birthday to Louis! It's crazy he's 22, I can't believe it the munchkin!

Have an amazing Christmas you guys, whether you got no presents or 50 presents. I love you ALL, and I want you to give a huge cheesy smile for me!

Thank you so so much to justthekissoflarry for giving me the idea and showing me this song! I've had it on repeat for a couple hours wow wow :O

Love you guys, I apologize because a lot of you tell me that my sad oneshots never fail to make you cry.

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