Life As Ariana Grande's Little Sister

✔️Chapter 6: Perfectly Imperfect

Aliana's POV

I came in my senses as I walked in my room back and forth saying, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! This can't be happening! Kaye, this isn't happening! Tell me!"

Then after, I found myself shaking Kaye's shoulders. Nervousness and trouble panged in my heart like crushing it into multiple pieces, I really don't know what to do right now.

I breathed in and breathed out fastly as my hands trembled and my lip quivered. "This isn't real, this isn't... God, no. I don't want to..."

I started to hyperventilate as tears spilled out. I really don't know what to do, I don't even know how to talk to her after all she did to me. I can't. I can't.

My friend held me tight. "Aliana! You're having another panic attack, just count one to ten slowly."

I closed my eyes and started to count the numbers: "One... Two... Three... Five... Seven... Six... Ten.."

"God, your panic attack is worse than before," she mumbled. "But now I want you to think happy thoughts. Positive thoughts, Ali."

Fuck, I can't even think clearly. But I start to think about puppies, just like my dad told me how. Sometimes he'd make me think about fireworks or unicorns. Anything that could make me smile.

So I noticed that my heavy breathing turned back to normal, as Kaye sighed. "She wants to talk to you... Hear her out!"

But instead of shaking her again like an idiot, I storm out of the room and went towards the living room.

And there she was, wearing her original Zara vintage coat, some Forever 21 printed leggings and boots which label is Prada. Oh, and plus, her famous brown Gucci bag with pink gloves covering her almost-tan skin. She was drop-dead gorgeous. And, oh, I'm reffering to Ariana, my so-called sister.

From that moment she left me, I was expecting that I wouldn't see her again. But here she was, standing right in front of me. I was now begging to myself to make sure this was a dream and just slap myself or pinch me to death, but I couldn't. This is it, I saw her again.

"Aliana? M-may I t-talk to you?" Ariana asked. For a celebrity-slash-popstar girl like her, she got some serious stammering, huh? Nah, every crying person does.

Her eyes were almost dragging herself to tears, she tried to sniff it away, but instead, it came out with each drop flowing against her acne-free skin. I cross my arms and look at her intently. I walked towards her with fire blazing my eyes. She stood up and tried to hug me, but instead, she failed.

Her chapped lips were already cured by (her favorite) cherry-flavored ChapStick, and her eyes were still beautiful even though she had been crying on them for the past minute until now. I took a step back, realizing that she was still my sister. Forever.

I went to the nearby closed window, and urged myself to open it. I needed fresh air. I was asthmatic, remember? And I can't handle these situations.

Until, I opened it and bent my body and inhaled. Then exhaled. I inhaled and exhaled over and over again until I found myself crying my heart out. And my flashback came by that I was doing the same thing what I was doing now when Ariana left me. What she did, left me weak and fragile. What she did, didn't make me a person anymore. What she did was unforgivable.

"Aliana? I-I'm sorry..." Ariana said as she held the back of my right shoulder. I slapped her away. Gasps escaped from their lips. I looked at Ariana with my mixed expressions. I don't know if I'm sad? Angry? Frustrated? Annoyed? Pissed? Depressed?

Relieved?

Then she looked at me back with those innocent eyes, those eyes who left her innocent sister, those eyes whom she used to see her riches and fame, those eyes who deceived her lonely sister, those eyes who portrayed her ONLY sister for fans, those eyes who looked at me; and those eyes who cried in front of a hundred dozen people in the auditorium, pleading down to me. And those eyes... who saw me crying when I was 11 years old, and had her decision to be famous. They were the eyes who left me.

"I'm sorry?! That's what all you can say, Ariana? Ha! You're not sorry! In fact, you enjoyed your riches and fame instead of enjoying being with your own sister! After 3 years of being alone in this damn place, this is all your answer? Sorry cannot replace it, Ariana! Anything can't replace it!" I shouted in front of her face as I fell down on my knees, once again, crying. I think I'm gonna throw up because of this.

And then I repeated, "You're not sorry."

I can see Ariana in the corner of my eye, crying, too. I have no other choice but to feel so... Selfish.

But everything she did, everything she had done all the way here... Just to see me? No, that's impossible. She has a world tour concert here, no reason to find me.

I looked up at her, and I stood up, wiping my tears with the sleeve of my sweater for the millionth time already. Instead of criticizing her again... I hugged her so tight that she'll explode. But instead of breaking away, she hugged back tightly, also crying. Now, her black eyeliner streamed down to her cheeks. She stroked my hair as I felt the same thing when we were little kids. I missed this moment. This moment was priceless and irreplaceable.

"Even if I'm angry at you for leaving me, I still miss you-" I cried, still not breaking the hug, earning numerous hiccups already, same as Ariana.

"-I still love you, Ariana."

"I still love you too, Aliana."

~ ~

"Still, I will not forgive you." I told Ariana as I sipped on my 2nd mug of Samantha's hot cocoa.

She nodded, "I can understand that," then she bites on a tea cracker.

Then Ariana wiped her hand with a tissue and drank some cocoa. In case you're wondering, Kaye is still here, but she's using my room; probably watching some Chick Flicks. And Samantha? She's shoveling the snowy trail.

Ariana piped in the glum silence and spoke, "Uhm, Aliana? I gotta go now. I have a meeting by 8:00 pm and it's already 7:15 pm. So... I'll come visit everyday. I love you, okay? Bye!" she smiled as she kissed my forehead and hailed a cab. And I was left, looking surprised.

After all what I have done... I actually reunited with my sister. I'm too punk rock for my shit. This is actually really cool.

_

Hello there the angel from my nightmareeee...

It's a freakin song so shaddup

Comment "ChapStick" if loved!

SOTC: Counting Stars by Augustana (not OneRepublic, kay?)

There's chapter 6! Hope y'all guys like it! Don't forget to hit the vote and comment button!

xx, sirenfatale

Edited on April 21, 2015