OUT OF THE PICTURE

Prologue || Marlin

Staring blankly at the A4 papers that were piling up on the desk was her way of killing time while waiting for her end shift. Marlin still couldn't believe that she had finished all of these 35 designs ahead of time. While everyone else had to take overtime or even spend their weekend here in the office to finish theirs, since it was due first thing in the morning on Monday next week.

It was 4:43 pm and she still had 15 minutes to hang around. Marlin wondered how would she going to spend her Friday night and the rest of the weekend, stay inside the house and do nothing was definitely on top of her list. She wasn't that kind of person who goes out every weekend, well, at least not anymore.

But she didn't want to hear another word from her aunt, who had been repeatedly telling her that she needed to go out sometime. Her Aunt Pearl even called her a "zombie" for having this exact routine everyday. She would wake up at 6 am, go to work at 7:45, and head home after 5 pm, and would do it all again the next day.

She didn't even bother to protest. Her Aunt Pearl was right.

For an instant, she realized how she became a different person in just a couple of weeks. She had changed. She figured out that this was just her body adapting to a new environment, but this could also be a defense mechanism of her body that was keeping her from the ugly truth.

It had been almost a month since she moved here in Long Beach, California to be with her aunt. But still, she could barely grasp everything that had happened in the last six months. Everything was unreal to her. It was unbelievable how everything could change in such a short period of time.

She was there, drowned in her thoughts until she was interrupted by a knock on the wall in her little workspace.

"Hey, what's up?" Steve from the next department.

"Uhm.. good."

"So you really finished all of these huh" He said while running his fingers on the thick pile of papers.

She nodded. "Yea, I had nothing to do earlier so..."

"Wow, you're a killer machine." He mumbled. "By the way, I'm gonna get coffee, you want one?"

"No, thanks."

"Okay." He shrugged as he was about to leave but he paused. "Oh, and one more thing, quit staring those poor papers, your killing 'em". He gave his best grin before walking away.

She faked a little laugh, not knowing what to respond. He went on his way.

Marlin wondered when would she be used to these casual conversations that her new co-workers had been giving her, when would she be able to reply without being awkward. She understood that they were trying to be nice and wanted to make her feel welcome as a newcomer, but she just felt uncomfortable with it. She was the person who needed the longest time to adjust.

She remembered what she had back then. A great job, great friends and a great life. She was happy.

For an instant, she felt a crush of memories overwhelmed her: those long nights, the hilarious pranks, Japanese foods for dinner, her favorite coffee at Toby's. She thought about Sarah and Shaun. She thought about Ivan.

She wiped her wet right cheek all of the sudden and settled herself. But still couldn't get her head from all of these ideas.

Unlike these past couple of weeks, she didn't feel anything about everything. She did what she supposed to do, but that was just it. There was no gratifying feeling when she get the job done, no excitement, no thrill.

She felt numb. Vulnerable. Helpless. Alone.

Tears started to run down her face. And this time, she couldn't control it. It got to her how everything can change all at once. How everything can fall into place and fall apart at the same time...