Lana Parrilla 27

14.

"Get back here!!!" I yelled my voice straining from all the yelling I've done. I'm surprised no ones come in here from all the noise. I stood up and tried to drag the chair to go out the door but what I didn't see was that I was also cuffed to the table. Great. Imbasells. I struggled for a few more moments till I could feel the cuff digging painfully into my lower calf. I can't believe I got my self into this. How mush more shit do I have to go through for everyone to understand that I'm only a teenager? I hit my fist against the table. My hands were imune to hits harder then that. I didn't hurt luckily. I leaned back and folded my arms in my lap and clenched my jaw thinking about what I was going to do if I had to pee. I didn't here the door open but I heard the jingle of tiny keys behind my head. With out warning I snatched the keys out of the hand and tried to back hand them till I realized who it was but it was to late. I slapped Lana across the face.
"I guess I deserved that." She rubbed her face gently. I could see my hand already making a mark on the side of her face. I rushed forward and undid the cuffs. When they were off I rubbed my leg gently trying to subside the sting were they had burrowed into my skin. She sat down on the bed.
"I knew you fallow. Didn't know how far you'd go. Next time Jen decides to dress up as a man she should really try and copy a mans look." I rolled my eyes at her. She chuckled lightly.
"Ahh....dear." She rubbed the side of her nose with her ring finger, then looked at me and half smiled. I sat back down but didn't look at her.
"Do I get to cash in that free permission to kick your ass that your mom gave me?" I didn't reply I just started drawing a ruff sketch of a Cabor tooth Tiger.
"I'm taking that as a no. Emilee what were you thinking? You know that I'm here for you no matter what you do. Why can't you understand that? I know you've had a rough life so far but it's not what happened in the past that defines you. It's what you choose to be that makes you." I stopped sketching and turned and looked her in the eyes. I saw a flash of fear in her eyes.
"You think I'm defining myself by my past? If you haven't caught up yet I'm an actress I've gone after my dream still after everything I've been through. I was told I'd be depressed I was told that I might be shy I was told that my mental state my not quite be there like it used to. But do you know what? I'm not depressed sure I have my times but that's part of being human. I have emotions. I'm not shy I never have been. My mind was never quite there to begin with anyway. Yet here I am an actress on my all time favorite show talking to my idol that has become a very close friend of mine. Do you think I could've done everything I've accomplished that I'm letting my past define me?" She seemed to have been studying me because when I finished her eyes were a mix between soft and sympathetic to haterd for what I don't know. She sat there a couple more moments longer.
"Emilee I'm sorry for everything bad that has happened to you. I know it's not coming from those you want to here it most but take it. Emilee I'm so glad to have meet you. I don't want you to ever feel the way you have in the past. You don't feel just with your heart you feel with everything you have. I'm sorry I was to stupid to see what you were really going through." I went back to sketching not buying anything. I don't want to be here and I sure as hell didn't ask her to come.
"Why are you here really?" She scoffed.
"Really? Your going to act like this? After everything I've gone through for you?" I wheeled around and stood up.
"I didn't ask you to!" I yelled. She stood up so we were eye level.
"Because I care for you. I didn't have to be asked. I did it because I care for you." I glared at her.
"I don't care I will continue the show but once it's over it's over. I'm not coming back. Now if you'll politely leave I would like to be alone." I was totally calm. Ok just a little raged slipped into my voice. She tilted her head to the side and shook her head lightly.
"I'll go. But only because you want me to not because I want to." She slipped past me and walked out the door, pausing a moment but left.
As soon as the door clicked I collapsed onto the bed and silently cried myself to sleep.

Lanas POV

I drove back to my house in silence. Everyone else was about an hour behind me. I left this mourning. I didn't want to have to explain what happened. Ginny called me earlier and said that Adam and Eddy had talked to Emilee and she is still on the show. So that was good. She didn't ask what we talked about no one did which was good. I did t want to talk to any one about it. It isn't fair that I cared for this girl straight off the bat and she sorta showed it back but then got scared and shut down. I get that she's had a nightmare of a child hood but that should just make her stronger. I don't think that I could be as brave as her if anything like that happened but then again it wouldn't hold me back.
Emilee is a young woman who's had an awful past but has a bright future.
I pulled off the exit and headed for my house. When I got to my house I pulled my car through the garage door. I sat there for a moment the pushed my door open. I dragged myself into my house and went straight to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels. I poured the dark amber liquid into a clear glass liquor cup. I filled it half way and capped it. I went to the living room and sat there not bothering to turn the lights on. I took a few sips and set it down on the side table.

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