CHANGE OF RULES

TWO STEPS BACK

Still realizations and reasons
___________________________

'I think Jimin likes me.'
'Wow that only took you...' Taehyung drawled, looking at his watch with a frown. 'One year. Good job, maknae.'
'Stop joking, hyung. Wait.' Jungkook gulped. 'What do you mean one year?!'
'Exactly what it sounds like. But if we are going on an enlightening tour at least get in the car.' Taehyung grinned.
Jungkook asked Taehyung to meet him – him, because no one else was available at o'clock in the morning to talk about something he only discovered a few hours prior – and at least he didn't nag him that he skipped sleep all together.
'Hyung, I feel stupid.' Jungkook said as he slumped down on the passenger seat.
'Well you should. Do you think we mercilessly teased you with Jin-hyung without basis? Us? No, worse. Me?' Taehyung asked incredulously as he started the car.
'Well I didn't know.' Jungkook sighed.
'Probably not only your fault.' Taehyung shrugged. 'That idiot acted like a kindergartner, making sure that no sane person would notice his elephant sized crush.'
'You mean...'
'Yeah, that me and Jin-hyung are not sane. As for Jimin, well let's see, being a mean brat, picking fights, teasing you and being an all around .' Taehyung nodded. 'When in reality he really, really cared. Like, who would check on you during ever single practice to see if you were not overworking?'
Jungkook blinked, because everything Jimin'd done was slowly getting a new meaning and he was suddenly overwhelmed.
His constant nagging, criticizing the hardest part of his choreography to change it to something easier, treating him to food whenever he was ready to work for hours more...
Jimin really cared.
'Oh god.'
'Sounds about right.' Taehyung smiled.
'What should I do?' Jungkook asked, hiding his face into his palms. Why him? Why would Jimin like him?
'Well I think the most important question is how you feel.' Taehyung advised. 'Not like you can do anything about someone else's feelings.'
How he felt?
Conflicted, overwhelmed, flattered, scared, panicked, embarrassed, wanted and needed but it was too much, too soon. He didn't know how to feel.
He didn't know how he wanted to feel.
Would he care as much too? Could he?
...he'd never been in love.
'I don't know... I'm completely blank.' Jungkook sighed.
'Then let's just enjoy the handsome-boys-trip, while you reconsider your life choices.' Taehyung grinned and with that he rolled down his windows and began to play trot songs that he sang loudly.
Seeing that it was barely 6 in the morning, their audience was mostly old ladies and the leftover party goers. Jungkook was left to hide in his seat, but even in the conflicts of his emotions he could not not notice how people stared at the car.
'Everyone is looking at you weirdly.' he noted, as they stopped at a lamp.
'Well good then. At least you are embarrassed about me not about your feelings.' Taehyung grinned, leaning over Jungkook to yell out the window. 'Good morning! Don't you think trot is the best remedy for any heart problem?'
The old ladies nodded, one of them giving Taehyung a thumb up.
'See, they think so too. So either sing along or just let me do it.'
'You really are embarrassing, hyung.' Jungkook shook his head, but he was thankful for the attempt.
Yet he still didn't know what to do. And this inability, this paralyzing feeling of not knowing was slowly eating his patience away.

He needed to talk to Hoseok too. That was the only thing he was sure about when Taehyung brought him back to the dorms.
He was his best support, and he knew him best. He needed his advice.
Jungkook was moving along the hallways with hurried steps – he wanted to catch him before his usual morning run.
He knocked, the door opened up, and... he really didn't think this through.
'Yeah?' Jimin blinked tiredly, only for his gaze to sharpen as he took in Jungkook's appearance. 'What happened? Where were you?'
'It doesn't matter, I-'
'You didn't listen to me?' Jimin asked, and he was hurt. And Jungkook felt awful, but he really couldn't talk to Jimin then. Not before he could sort this out with himself. Not before talking to his hyung...
'Where is Hoseok-hyung?' he demanded, brushing aside Jimin's question.
'Why are you looking for Hoseok?' Jimin asked, cheeks flushing in anger as his eyes narrowed.
'None of your business.' Jungkook snapped - he had to be away from this conflict.
'Are you this desperate for attention?' Jimin spit with venom, and the meaning was clear. The Room.
'I wouldn't know!' Jungkook exclaimed, anger flaring up in him at the accusation. 'I'm not you!'
And there it was. The real hurt, the one that broke through shields of facades. It shone in Jimin's eyes clearly, painfully, and Jungkook stopped breathing all together.
He didn't mean it-
Jimin slammed the door shut with enough force to rattle it. The sound echoing down the hallways.