Story of My Life

Chapter 9

As Ma paced the floor. Mrs. Gladstone sat at the kitchen table sipping on her 4th

glass of Chardonnay.

"Will you sit down," she slurred. "Lois is a big girl. She can take care of herself."

"Maybe if she would return my calls, I'd feel better." Ma exclaimed.

"She's on a date for god sakes, why do think she'd call you back?"

Ma sat down at the kitchen table, picked up her glass and toasted Mrs.

Gladstone. "Lois doesn't get out much, what if he's a serial killer or worse?"

Mrs. Gladstone shook her head "Nothing worse than that, but I did tell her

about George, maybe there's hope for those two yet."

"I just wish she'd call me back." Ma topped off her wine glass.

"For Godsakes, let the girl live, and what about you, when was the last time

you were out on a date?"

Ma giggled, "Who would want to hang out with an old broad like me?"

Raising her glass in the air, Mrs. Gladstone continued, "My nephew George is available."

Ma's mouthful of white wine decorated her kitchen table cloth and the surrounding area.

"Are you kidding me! "How old is he 25, 26?" she choked uncontrollably.

"Sure you could be his leopard, I hear its good for the soul." Mrs. Gladstone said slamming her

empty wine glass on to the table harder than she planned. Using her forearms she pushed herself

away from the table, sliding the chair legs across the linoleum with a screech.

"Why on God's green earth would I want to be a leopard?" Ma slurred, "And what the hell does

that have to do with George?"

Ma very seldom drank alcohol for when she did her vocal output became a string of cuss words.

"Go to bed," Mrs Gladstone said as she swayed gently towards the exit. Steadying herself

between the door frame she looked back at Ma, who was slowly making her way towards the

sofa.

"I'll tell my leopard you want to be his nephew. "

"Yeah, I'll be his nephew," a drunken Ma said as she collapsed on the familiar sunflower printed

cover.