Chapter 18~Crying#2

30 3 2
                                    

I've found lots of accounts on wattpad saying at the description "Meet ****on ***"
And at the profile,a picture of them and their idols
And I'm always thinking
"Why I wasn't there?"
"It should be me"
"Why not me?"
Then,knowing that we're not special for them
We are just fans between others and others
They are our one and only but we are one from a milion of fans

And I'm always thinking:
~Do you know how hard is it to love someone who will never love you back and you live knowing that?

Do you know how hard is pretend to be ok even if you wanna destroy yourself so bad with only a knife?

Do you know how is feeling to be judged just because you love a person that even doesen't know you exist?
Really now,yeah,maybe they know that and they gave to us a special day,the day when is our second birthday,the day when we scream louder&louder because we feel important,the day when we're waiting seconds,minutes and hours after hours for them to say to us a poor"Hey,guys,happy B-Day!"but nothing...

Never

Ever

Nothing

The day we feel special
One half of us

The day when I've cried a lot
And for what?
For nothing
I was a stupid
I am a stupid
Tell me what you want
Judge me
Kill me
But don't hate the part of me that hates them.
Yup
I hate them
Because what I'm dreaming it will never ever happen
And maybe is time to forget
Time to move on
Time to make all the tears disapear
Time to let myself die
Slowly
I hate them
Is not their fault,maybe
But is my fault because I love what I can't have

I Am Meaner Than My DemonsUnde poveștirile trăiesc. Descoperă acum