Becca's Moments

Chapter ThirtyFour

Becca

My birthday was in five days. I tried to keep it under wraps, but all my friends had a good memory. They took turns reminding me on the lead-up to the big day, and today was apparently Natalie's shift. I stared at the ceiling, my phone beside me on loudspeaker as she rattled on.

"...and we can go to that Sexy Fish restaurant in the evening around eight o'clock, take some cute pictures, then go Mayfair. There's some decent bars there."

"So, you want me to spend twenty pounds on a bowl of rice, then waste even more money on drinks in Mayfair?"

"Bitch, it's your birthday. You're supposed to spend money. The fuck?"

I shut my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. "I'm good."

Natalie kissed her teeth. "You're the most stubborn girl I know. Like, how could you not want to celebrate your eighteenth? Have all your closest people around you. Toast to another year of health and wealth, all that shit. Then you won't have to do anything until the next milestone."

"Cool. You guys can come here and we'll have a bottle of wine or sumn."

She groaned, and I smiled at her frustration. She'll give up any minute now.

"I just want you to be happy, sis."

My smile fell. "Who said I wasn't happy?"

"I just feel like you haven't been yourself since..."

Her wavering sentence said it all, but I disagreed. Maybe I was devastated when he first disappeared, and he crossed my mind every once in a while, but I overcame the heartbreak. Having to convince people that my world didn't revolve around him was tiring. Plus, Tyreece had been a rock; the perfect adhesive to put me back together. Even the shooting incident was a distant memory. I was only coping before, but now I'm living.

"Trust me, I'm happy."

Natalie fell silent for a few seconds, then: "Okay. But we're still celebrating you."

I laughed at her determination. "Good luck with that." I heard a knock on my door. "I have to go. Talk later?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just start planning your birthday outfit."

"Nope! Bye."

She laughed. "Later!"

Kieran opened the door as I hung up. "I'm going shop quick. You want anything?"

I shook my head. "Nah, I'm good."

"Cool. I beg you lock the door behind me."

I gave him a thumbs up and he shut the door, his heavy footsteps descending the stairs. Once the front door slammed, I left my room and trudged downstairs to turn the lock.

The house was silent. Dad and Uncle Clayton were still hard at work renovating Nan's home. They'd take turns to speak to contractors, update appliances and paint different rooms. Sometimes they'd bring Andre or Kieran to help, but this time Claycia and Diamond tagged along. As for Andre? He was gallivanting with his friends somewhere. It was rare to have the place to myself.

I headed back upstairs and heard faint music from the third floor. Living in a townhouse meant that I rarely went upstairs; that was where Kieran's bedroom, the second bathroom and the spare bedroom were. I followed the sound and ended up in Kieran's room. He'd left everything on, including his stereo. The radio played a song that was all too familiar to me.

K-Ci & Jojo's 'Crazy' seeped through the speakers. It transported me back to Kayden's birthday last year when he serenaded me in his car. What was once a precious memory now left a bittersweet taste in my mouth. We were still in that limbo phase, teetering between friends and lovers. But we had so much fun.