Becca's Moments

Chapter ThirtySix

Silence. Nothing but awkward, ominous silence.

I remained completely rigid and frozen; stiff yet brittle. Unable to move an inch, yet I wanted nothing more than to run as fast as I could. My breathing literally slowed and all actions came to a halt. Even blinking seemed like too much of a task. I was at a loss for words. My heart continued to thud loudly deep within my chest, echoing through my ears, much louder than usual. It was remarkable how long neither one of us had uttered a single word. Ironically enough, the silence was deafly. It was amazing how after so many months, his image was the same.

His eyes pierced into mine; there was something mysterious and dark about them, as if he currently wasn't himself. He hadn't changed a bit, that was what scared me the most. It had been so long since I'd seen him; it was almost too good to be true. In fact, it was too good to be true. This was some form of sick joke, the equivalent of God shoving his middle finger in my face. I had no idea how to react to something so shocking.

My knees buckled, causing me to almost lose my balance and fall, but I soon regained my posture. All he had to do was stand there and he still had me falling for him, literally. He smiled. I admired his face and realised how much I missed his smirk, especially the way his rigid jawbone slanted to form that unique smile.

"Be careful," he said.

The familiar voice brought back the many memories that we shared. I sighed and hastily swallowed the lump that threatened to ascend my throat before stepping backward. He watched my every move; his actions were swift. Nothing could explain as to why he was here randomly, out of the blue, or even why he had left in the first place. There were too many questions that needed to be answered.

I began to wonder if this was merely a dream. That would be the only reasonable explanation. There was no way in hell that he could appear in such a way, this was purely imagination. It had to be. After a long pause my breathing became intact once again. Ignoring the migraine I was experiencing from current events, and the weakness I felt from my recovery, I leaned against the doorframe.

"I'd like to wake up now," I said quietly, hoping God could hear me, but he simply neglected my wishes. I wanted to awake from this bad dream, hopefully once I did, I'd be back in bed. He watched me with a straight face, one brow raised. "This is a dream...this...this isn't real," I assured myself with a shaky breath. "I wanna wake up now."

"This isn't a dream," he stated.

My chest tightened at hearing that deep voice again. I peered upward to the ceiling, desperate for assistance or support.

"I wanna wake up," I said more loudly. I hate being ignored. He then began to walk towards me. I quickly held my hand up in protest. "Don't! Don’t come near me...no..."

He came closer regardless and held my face in his hands. His warm palms soothed my insecurities and caused my body to shiver instinctively.

"Relax," he muttered softly, his hoarse voice penetrating my ears.

Seeing him stood before me was unreal. I didn't like this particular dream; my vivid imagination was getting the better of me now. I wanted to be revived from this hellish nightmare. I needed to wake up somehow.

"You're not real," I insisted. "You're not." He frowned slightly. I stared ahead at the wall, waiting to wake up from this one of many dreams. My mind always fucked around with me, it wasn't funny at all.

"Rebecca..." he began.

"You're just my imagination," I stated firmly. I closed my eyelids tightly and counted mentally to three before opening them once again, hoping that he had gone. Instead, I remained face to face with him. He was still stood in front of me, gripping onto my shoulders and peering at me as if I had turned insane. I looked up at the ceiling. "You're taking the piss now," I said, but God never heard, and I still didn't wake up. It all seemed so real, but I didn't want to believe that it was for one second.