nightmares ; yoonmin

chapter 12

the day they had to leave daegu, yoongis heart felt heavier than ever. "you'll come too visit again soon, right hyung?" his brother asked him as they bid their fair wells, and yoongi almost cried right then and there. but instead he nodded quickly, "of- of course i will. i promise. i'll never abandon you again." he muttered the last part, and joonhyun looked away for a fleeting moment, his breath hitching in his throat. "i promise." yoongi repeated, pulling his brother in for a tight hug, and feeling a sigh of relief leaving the young boys body.

jimin smiled and waved, joonhyun doing the same in return before their train began to whistle, signaling the last call for passengers to board. "love you!" yoongi called right before they made their way onto the train, jimins hand in his own but his head facing towards his brother, who was still standing on the platform. "i love you too, hyung." joonhyun responded, voice quiet because yoongi wouldnt be able to hear him anymore, anyway. he just hoped that yoongi knew how he felt without him having to actually tell him. 

yoongi slept the entire ride back home, his head resting on jimins shoulder and his body cradled into one of jimins arms wrapped around him. jimin hummed soft melodies to fill the silence, their early train ride was almost completely empty apart from themselves and a few other people in the next section down. during some points in the long ride, jimin pulled out an ink pen and doodled small patterns onto the skin of one of yoongis hands, yoongi always liked it when he did that, saying "its like your giving me my own personal tattoos made just for me by you." 

yoongi woke to the sound of the trains breaks screeching to a stop, as they finally arrived at their destination. "ah, sorry i slept so long." yoongi mumbled in a sleepy voice as they exited the train, leaning over one of jimins shoulders from behind to plant a small kiss to his cheek. jimin smiled warmly at his tired looking boyfriend, "its okay, i kept myself busy just fine." jimin responded in a gentle voice, reaching out to settle yoongis wild strands of hair for him. yoongi didnt respond, just sent a lazy smile jimins way and grabbed onto his hand as they walked on the platform. yoongi didnt mention how jimin hadnt been sleeping very often.

the moment they entered yoongis small apartment, the one right next door to jimins own, yoongi pulled jimins body onto the bed and smothered him in cuddles. "hyung- what-" jimin giggled as yoongi held him closely to his chest, peppering kisses along the side of his face. "can we sleep? im tired." yoongi yawned once he had decided that jimins face had gotten enough kisses for the time being. jimin visibly stiffened in yoongis arms and for a moment he feared he had said something wrong. "i- um- i have unpacking to do! i'll just- just go get that done now, you can sleep here!" jimin said in a voice that almost sounded frantic, and yoongi knew something was wrong.

before jimin got a chance to stand up, yoongi tugged him back down by the arm. "whats wrong?" he said gently, cupping one side of jimins face with his hand. jimin clenched his eyes shut, turning his head away and out of yoongis grasp. "im just- im just afraid." he whispered, his voice cracking at the end in a way that made yoongis heart ache. yoongi sighed softly, "i know, i know but you dont have to be. your taking medicine and even if you do have one, i'll be here." yoongi said in a voice equally as quiet as jimins had been.

jimin stayed silent and sniffled a little, before turning back to yoongi. "i- i know, b- but its just hard. its hard to trust that i wont hurt you or that it will go away. its been this way so long, im even scared of myself." and jimin didnt know why he was all of a sudden pouring his feelings out to yoongi like this, but it had to happen sooner or later and now just happened to be the right time. "i remember my mom telling me once when i was young that when it was happening, she felt like she didnt even know who i was. i dont ever want that to happen again." jimin said, his eyes pooling with tears this time.

"i understand," yoongi responded immediately, "but no matter how you act, i always know that your my jimin. even if you punch me in the face, you're still you. and i still love you. thats why i stay." yoongi said to him, as if he had thought about this exact conversation in his head before and knew exactly what to say. jimin didnt cry anymore after that, because he didnt have to. yoongi was here to stay and that alone made his heart leap in his chest.

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a/n iTS BEEN SO LONG ALMOST A fULL MONTH I AM SO TERRIBLE BUT I HOPE THIS IS OKAY AND I WILL MAKE SURE TO TRY AND UPDATE THIS STORY MORE OFTEN BECAUSE I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE WRITING IT AHH (i dont know how i feel about this chap, but eh)

lots of love, namjoon1994 !