POINT OF VIEW → bts fanfiction

Chapter 1

A/N: Dedicated to Kim Taehyung, who showed me that I could happily be myself.

         She placed the pencil beside the notebook. Gently, as if possible to bruise the wood. With a sigh and a twist of her cramped wrist, Nabi reread the first chapter of her newest project. This would be the fifth one this month. She chewed her lip as her eyes scanned the scrawling handwriting. With a determined gaze, she glanced at the small fishbowl at the corner of her desk.

"This is the one, Blaze. I can feel it." She dared a smile. But the small, blue fish simply waved his fins dismissively.

"I know what you're thinking." Nabi frowned. "I'm thinking it too."

Nabi loved to write. Ideas flowed and wandered around her mind without ceasing. She was always itching to put her pencil to paper. Writing was the only time that Nabi felt open. When she had that yellow notebook in front of her, ideas poured out onto the paper. As if one had broken a dam. The only problem was that she had never finished a single book. Half filled notebooks sat dusty and yellowing on her small shelf. Dusty but not forgotten. Never forgotten. It was her goal to finish all that she had started. But sometimes it seemed she would never fulfill that wish. Neither Blaze nor Nabi herself knew why it was so impossible to finish any of her projects. All of them were so rich with raw story-telling, so why was it so hard to just finish one? Maybe because she grew tired of them so easily. And when she lost the spark of determination in an unfinished story, it became bothersome to write, while the whole purpose of her writing was to escape her troubles.

And so on that evening, Nabi had begun a new book. One that sadly, would probably be joining the others on that project shelf. With another sigh, she pushed the chair back from the desk and laid on her bed. Determination was what she'd always wanted, boldness was what she'd never had. Life was what she needed to experience. But how can someone experience life, if loneliness and a dusty desk is all they'd ever known?

Nabi's P.O.V

I jumped at the sound of the apartment door shutting. I squeezed my eyes closed, and tried to wish away the takeout mom had surely brought home. My stomach growled, but I slapped a hand on it, trying to silence the noise. I didn't want to be hungry. I didn't want to eat that food. The food that reminded me of our situation. At least, that's what Mom called it. "It's just a certain situation we've found ourselves in. But it's only for the time being," She would say. "It'll turn up once I'm promoted" or "This town is where it's all gonna change". It never did.

"Dinner, Nabi!" She called from the kitchen.

There was no need to raise her voice. The walls of the apartment were so thin, I would have heard if she'd whispered. I opened my eyes. With a groan, I dragged myself out of my closet of a room.

"What a surprise." I motioned at the food, sarcasm clung to my words.

"Are you going to eat or not?" She sighed.

I looked away. It's not like it was easy for her either. I knew that. But sometimes, I wished she would just acknowledge the fact that we were poor. Instead of sugar coating it, like everything was going to magically turn around. My mom was just so optomistic like that. Guess I was more of a pessimist. My stomach growled again, but I turned to my room.

"I'm not hungry," I lied.

Chances are, she wasn't going to eat, either.

•●•●•●•

taehyung+nabi >> "Best of Me" - BTS