New Ways

TWENTY-NINE

Amery

[Flashback]

I entered one of the bathrooms in Lloyd's huge house and locked the door behind me. I closed the lid of the toilet bowl and sat on top of it. After the dramatic encounter with drunk Mikayla from the cheerleading squad, I had gotten a tad too drunk myself in an attempt to forget what she had said to me. The world spun after but it still did not erase Mikayla's words from my mind.

"You're not all that, Tatcher. The world doesn't revolve around you. In fact everybody here hates you. Your minions in Student Council obey you not because they respect you, but they fear you. Guys in school only want to sleep with you cause you're hot but given your personality? They'd rather be with me. Your best friends are only stuck with you because they pity you. And Derek? He doesn't deserve you. He's better off without someone as conceited and heartless as you. Stop wasting your time around him. No one really wants to be around you."

After Mikayla and I finished exchanging bitchslaps, I went to drink about a few bottles of liquor and now I'm seated in someone's bathroom sobbing uncontrollably not only at the fact that I had just been ridiculed in front of practically the whole school but also at the fact that none of my best friends and Derek were there to stand up for me.

I had felt so loathed and unworthy that night. I couldn't stop crying and I tried by hitting my knees hard with my fists in hopes that I would be distracted by the pain that would develop eventually. I only cried more with every hit, until I felt a pair of hands gripped my wrists.

"Stop hurting yourself," I looked up and everything was spinning, except for the girl in front of me. She had long brown hair and a pair of soft hazel eyes. She was wearing a black crop top with a pair of skinny jeans and combat boots. She knelt down in front of me as I struggled to free my wrists from her strong grip. How did she even get in here? If she was here before me, how did I not notice that?

"Stop," she repeated. I gave up trying to fight her and started sobbing again.

"Everybody hates me. I just got into a catfight with my nemesis and my best friends are somewhere else having fun. My object of affection, I think he doesn't even like me that way. Nobody in Parmont does. I don't know how to fix it. I don't wanna be alone," I whined, and the girl reached out to wipe the tears off my cheeks. Her hands felt so soft and comforting. I finally felt that someone actually cared about me.

"You're not alone. I'm here, aren't I? I don't hate you," she said, pushing a strand of my fallen blonde hair back behind my ear.

"You don't?" I croaked. "Why? Everyone does."

She smiled and caressed my cheek with her thumb. "I'm not 'everyone'."

"Thank you," I said, wrapping my arms around her neck and pulling her into a hug. She hugged me too and rubbed my back, still not done consoling me.

When we finally let go, we held each other's gazes for a while before I closed whatever gap there was in between us and pressed my lips on hers. I didn't know why I did that, I didn't even think it twice. When the girl didn't repel, I bit her bottom lip before sliding my tongue into her mouth. Our tongues wrestled passionately as I run my fingers through her hair and held her head in place. It felt so right and I felt a kind of connection I never felt with anyone before.

I didn't want this moment with the girl to ever end but we had to stop for air and when we did, I rested my forehead against hers while we both panted and smiled at each other.

"You're my angel," I whispered, my drunkenness now doubled by the high I got from just kissing this godsend in front of me. "That means you'll be there for me when I need it the most. Swear it."

"Or else?"

"Or else I will tell the whole school you took advantage of me while I was drunk," I warned.

I threatened Sigrid?! I kissed her, made her swear that she would be there for me when I needed it and then threatened to ruin her life if she didn't obey me? After what she did to make me feel better about the most horrible night I've ever had? What the hell was I thinking? Oh, right. I wasn't even thinking. Everything was starting to make sense now. The unexplainably familiar feeling Sigrid gave me and how she just happened to magically be around when I needed some sort of rescuing. She was my angel after all. My angel by force and at this moment I swear no words could ever describe the amount of guilt I felt towards Sigrid Sharma.