i: aphrodite & hephaestus

2.2K 119 92
                                    

I: APHRODITE AND HEPHAESTUS

characters:

HESTIA, a primary school teacher

APHRODITE, the prettiest girl in 2K

HEPHAESTUS, her young neighbour and admirer

ARES, a brat with very clearly defined ideas of masculinity

THE REST OF "3K"; ZEUS & POSEIDON (the "BIG BOYS"); HERA, DEMETER & ARTEMIS (the "GIRLY-GIRLS"); APOLLO, HERMES & DIONYSUS (the "TROUBLEMAKERS"); ATHENA & HADES (the "LONERS"), a class of seven year-olds


SCENE 0 - PRELUDE

[Enter HESTIA, dressed in typical teaching attire. She begins to arrange her classroom alone, speaking as she does so.]

HESTIA: It doesn't matter how old a person is, they will always be susceptible to the power of beauty.

[She picks up a child's painting of a girl with long, lustrous hair, a beautiful dress and a barely-there body and looks at it pointedly.]

HESTIA: Have you ever seen a very small boy talk to a beautiful woman? It's reasonably comical if only because of the similarities one sees when a grown man talks to a beautiful woman. [She puts the painting back down.] There isn't much difference between adults and children. You'd think it all goes away but it doesn't. Not really. Adults just get better at hiding what they're feeling -- resisting what they're feeling. [Pause.] Or they think they do, anyway.

[Bell rings signalling start of school day. HESTIA sighs.]

HESTIA: They'll be here soon, I suppose. [She finishes arranging/tidying the classroom and straightens up.] How's teaching a class of seven year-olds? Oh, fine, really. Not bad at all. But do you know, it's the boys I have the most trouble with, sometimes. They have the strangest ideas of what's right and wrong, of what they can and can't do...it's very hard for me to tell them otherwise. It's like they all know exactly what makes a -- a man. [Pauses with a wry smile.] Or should I say, a "big boy". And I -- [HESTIA is interrupted by the babbling of her class as they come trooping through the door. ARTEMIS, HERA and DEMETER enter first, arms linked in a sickening display of codependency.]

GIRLY-GIRLS (ARTEMIS / HERA / DEMETER): [in unison] Good morning, Miss!


SCENE 1 - HESTIA TAKES THE REGISTER

HESTIA: Good morning, girls. I'm sure the three of you may find that if you didn't link your arms quite so closely you may actually be able to get through the door.

[The girls titter, but do not separate, and instead try and enter the classroom sideways. Behind them comes ATHENA, alone, who huffs in exasperation and glares at the three girls in front of her.]

ATHENA: Miss, can you tell them they're being stupid?

HESTIA: Good morning to you, too, Athena. And we don't use that kind of language inside my classroom, thank you.

ATHENA: [muttering] I'm not in your classroom because they won't even move -- [at HESTIA's pointed look] Sorry. [She turns to the three girls, who are giggling at themselves.] Can you please move? Please?

HubrisWhere stories live. Discover now