Running Parallel

I Skipped A Meal

I skipped a meal.

I was in a dark place, involuntarily thinking dark thoughts, and reached the seafloor of the dark abyss, opening a door to my mind which I did not know existed.

I skipped a meal, because it was my fault.

Because I was made to believe that I, a fifteen-year-old girl, was responsible for something so significant and beyond my control. I could not wrap my head around that fact that the cause was unknown.

I love my brother, dislocated knee and all, but while he was getting "battle scars", apparently I was getting "stretch marks". 

I skipped a meal, because I was told to "eat less".

What weight am I supposed to lose when I am only a hundred and ten pounds at best?

I skipped a meal to prove a point.

I skipped a meal to prove to my father that while he was encouraging his son, he was discouraging his daughter. 

I skipped a meal, because I was told I was "stupid".

Despite how many ninety's I brought home, I could not rid myself of that undiluted remark.

I skipped a meal and I am not proud of it.

Because when I refused to eat in order to hurt to hurt him, the only person I was hurting was me.