this ones for you

things to NEVER tell a girl

"You're too pretty to be single"
Why is one person's idea of ideal aestheticism
A basis for a relationship status
And furthermore
What is so goddamn shameful or pathetic about being single anyway
Is confidence and comfort in being by one's self intimidating to you
"Swearing is unladylike"
Bullshit
Swears are only words
And these words do not negate my intelligence, or passion, or define anything about me as a person or my character
Men are never told not to swear
Swear as much as you fucking want
"Your standards are too high! Just give him a chance"
No
You are invalidating a woman's right to say no
She doesn't need to explain herself to anyone
She doesn't owe anyone anything
Ever
Everyone should have standards for themselves, and not feel like they need to lower them to please anyone
Or be shamed for leading someone on when they know it would never work
Because that happens too
"If you dress like that, boys will get the wrong idea"
What idea might that be?
That women might actually feel beautiful and confident in their own bodies?
Heaven forbid
Because obviously women's bodies belong to everyone else except themselves
"Don't frown - someone might be falling in love with your smile!"
Why
Is it my responsibility to always smile no matter how I feel
I am a human being who is allowed to experience pain, or confusion, or sorrow, or boredom
Men are never criticized for having "resting bitch face"
"Short hair makes you look like a boy!"
This is assuming
That there is one certain way for "boys" and "girls" to look
Not so
Some boys have long hair, some girls have short hair, some people who are both or neither also have hair
Hair has no gender
Humans are allowed to look different from each other and express themselves how they like
Gender identity and gender expression are not the same
They aren't "real" girls because they were born with a penis
Anyone is a girl who says they are a girl
Stop trying to undermine someone's identity
They know themselves better than you do
Anatomy and identity are different, and sometimes separate
Why are you so obsessed with other people's genitals anyway
"You're going to break a lot of hearts one day"
Why would you ever
Ever
Say this to a girl
A young, impressionable girl
Breaking hearts is not a compliment, or a goal
Coming from someone who has broken at least one
From simply being honest and being myself
It is a burden - a guilt that has been (mis)placed on my shoulders since childhood
I never wanted to be labelled a heartbreaker simply for existing
"You don't want kids? You'll change your mind one day"
No I won't
Even if I do, one day, that doesn't make my opinion right now any less valid or deserving of respect
Stop disbelieving people about their own life choices
Also, having children is not a necessary milestone for a successful or fulfilling life
"Don't have sex before marriage - boys really want a virginal girl"
Sure they do
And are boys ever held to that same expectation
To stay virgins until marriage?
Because as women are shamed for "impurity," boys are applauded for "experience"
I love the smell of double standards in the morning
"You shouldn't wear so much makeup"
The natural look is great
The makeup look is great
The anything you feel like doing or not doing to your own face look is great
Let people do whatever they want to their own bodies
Whatever makes them feel good
Why do you care
"Selfies are just for attention"
Maybe
Maybe not
What's so wrong about liking attention
What's so wrong about feeling beautiful and confident in your own skin
And wanting to share that feeling with others
We were taught for so long to hate our bodies
What is so threatening about finally loving them
"Cat-calling is flattering! Learn how to accept a compliment!"
"I like your hair" is a compliment
"You're a really talented writer" is a compliment
The gross, vulgar things that men shout at women they don't know on the street
Are not compliments
They are harassment - meant to imply ownership and dominance and even violence
Compliments should not make people fear for their lives walking home
Compliments should not actually get people killed.
- angelxhunter on tumblr