Daryl Dixon's Weakness

Chapter 22 - Absolutely Everything

After Daryl had finished grumbling how it wasn't safe, I tagged along anyway. Hell, as if I was going to let a moody Dixon stop me! Like usual he hadn't said one word, although this time it was probably because he was so focused on following the trail in the dark. I decided I would keep my mouth shut this time and just roll with it. Do it the Dixon way.

We were about 30 minutes into our late night search when he finally spoke up. "If you're gonna stick with me for this long then you need to start talking." He bluntly stated. My eyes widened in surprise to the words that just fell from his mouth.

"Wait you want me to talk? What happened to 'don't bug me I'm Daryl Dixon leave m-" I began imitating his voice, trying to lighten up the mood, before I was interrupted.

"Shut up. That's not what I meant asshole," He spoke with slight amusement in his voice, "I mean you need to tell me what's been up with you these past few days."

"I-I don't understand.." I thought I had been pretty much myself this whole time. Confusion pulsed through my brain as I tried to figure out what he meant.

"It's like you've been somewhere else. Like you're trapped in yer own mind. Something's goin on in that head of yours, you been crying, shaking, pushing people away more than I ever seen before. It's like I get so close to seeing what's up with ya but ya never let me in." He explained. I stayed quiet for a moment, processing this new information. The more I thought about it, the more I knew he was right. And there was only one reason for this. My past.

"Huh. I guess you're right. But it's not something I can just explain Daryl. I mean I wish I could, it's just I don't even understand it myself. I've never been someone who's had people to open up to or even trust..ever. And for the first time people are getting closer to me and it's making me want to talk about things that I've never spoken about before, my past. The truth is, I think I'm scared." I tried to explain to him the best I could, however, I knew I wasn't making much sense. He stopped in his tracks and turned to face me. I couldn't read his eyes but I could tell he was deep in thought.

"Your past?" He questioned. I nodded my head 'yes' and then looked to the floor, almost in shame. "If it helps mine was pretty shit too. I was basically a no one, a waste of space. Always cleaning up everybody else's mistakes, not living a life of my own. And my family? Well let's just say I would have been better off having no family at all." He told me with pure anger and resentment in his words. "I had no friends, no one to turn to and no one who gave a shit so I get that it's scary now, hell it freaks me out too. But just know..." He hesitated, unsure on whether to say those next words. I couldn't bear the suspense, I had to know what he was going to say.

"What? Know what?" I gently encouraged. He let out a long sigh and scratched the back of his neck.

"Just know...that you never have to be afraid of me." 

I gave him the warmest smile I could muster, feeling touched by his heartfelt words. Somehow this redneck always knew exactly what to say. I started moving towards him with my arms stretched outwards. He must have known what I was about to do as his gentle facial expression soon turned into a scowl. "Woman don't you dare!" He called out. I, however, ignored his warning and enveloped him into a warm hug. At first he was as tense as a steel pole but he soon gave in and reciprocated the hug. 

It felt safe, natural. Like this was where we were always meant to be.

I slightly nuzzled my face towards his neck, goosebumps forming over both of our skin. "Thank you," I simply whispered in his ear. "And just for the record, if what you said is true, you may have been nothing before all this....but you mean absolutely everything now."

You mean absolutely everything to me.

*  *  *  *  *

We had just finished packing up our stuff, ready to move onto this mysterious farm that was supposedly a safe haven just down the road. I had been continuously praying in my mind that Carl was still alive and the rest of the group were unharmed. I could feel my anxiety buzzing in the air around me, trying to intensify the fear I was feeling. 

I was leaning against a car getting my breathing stable whilst trying to look as cool as possible. Meh. We can always try! I saw in the corner of my eye a certain Dixon approaching. He stood in front of me as I gave him a wonky half-assed smile, it was the best I could do. I felt Daryl and I had become so much closer after our conversation the night before which filled my heart with joy and satisfaction. He took one look at me before saying,

"You. On my bike now." 

My eyebrows must have risen so high that they floated off into the sky. It took all my strength to contain the giggles that were threatening to escape.

"Well, Mr Dixon, if that wasn't an innuendo I don't know what is, but if you insist!" I gave him a cheeky wink and watched as the redness slowly crept it's way onto his cheeks. I chuckled and walked past him whilst tapping his shoulder.

"God damn woman." I heard him mutter before reluctantly following me. I swung my leg over the bike and shuffled backwards leaving him plenty of room to get on. After he did so, I slid forwards slowly and carefully wrapped my arms around his toned waist. This time I was the one blushing, feeling very hot being in such close proximity to him. I propped my chin onto the back of his shoulder so my mouth was next to his ear.

"Onwards, Dixon" I gently spoke to him, wondering what effect it would have. All of a sudden I heard a low groan come from deep within Daryl's throat as I felt his muscles tense underneath me. Woah.

As quick as lightening, he started up the motorbike to cover the beautiful sound he just made. It was too late, I had most definitely heard it. We took off, the wind whipping through our hair and chilling our skin. And me...

With a big fat smirk on my face.

Author's Note

Hey everyone! Again I just wanted to say thank you for all your continued support for this story! I'm so sorry it's taken me ages to update, I'm currently going through exam season which I'm sure a lot of you can relate to! This will mean unfortunately that my updates will be quite slow for the next month or so. Again I'm super sorry for that, but I'll try my best.

Hope you're all okay and I'll get the next update finished as soon as I can!

Thanks, love you all xx