Daryl Dixon's Weakness

Chapter 24 - Thoughts and Feelings

Saskia's POV

The sun was just beginning to set over our new home and my anxiousness for Daryl's return was rapidly increasing. He had been gone for over two hours and I couldn't help but fear the worst. My mind was overwhelmed with the realisation that I wouldn't know what I would do without him. He had become something of a best friend to me, but there was something more to my feelings no matter how much I tried to deny it. It was eating away at me day and night and I was noticing physical side effects as well. I couldn't eat, my stomach too full with butterflies, I couldn't sleep, my mind intimidated with thoughts of Daryl. For someone with anxiety, the thought of growing this close to a person was terrifying, the feeling of not being good enough swirling through my brain and I felt the only solution was to tell him. I had to. Otherwise this would have killed me from the inside out. Could he really care about someone as broken as me?

Daryl's POV

I had been searching for Sophia for nearly 3 hours now with not a lot of hope. I had managed to find an abandoned house with a few belongings left behind, however, I was doubtful that it could have been Sophia. There were a fair few walkers around in these crappy woods and honestly I encountered too many close calls. I knew I shouldn't have gone out on my own but I can't just sit on my ass any longer. My brushes with death had opened my eyes to one person in particular though. Saskia. I became afraid that I wouldn't be around to protect her anymore and I felt devastated by the idea of never seeing her gorgeous face again. I don't know what it was but I got the feeling that she is somewhat vulnerable, that something in her life had made her that way. Maybe I'm just the same with my fucked up background. There was more than just feeling the need to protect her, I knew there was something deeper, I was just struggling to accept it. I had never cared for a woman properly before in my life and this new concept was scaring me. I knew I had to do something to crush this fear and I had a feeling I knew what to do. I had to tell her, before it was too late and I lost her to walkers or someone else. But could she really care about someone as broken as me?

Saskia's POV

I decided to visit Carl to take my mind off Daryl. I knocked on the simple wooden door and carefully entered the warmly lit room. I saw Carl laying on a double bed, looking small and vulnerable compared to the size of the bed. His head slowly turned towards me and a small smile crept onto his face.

"Hey buddy," I spoke quietly, "How ya doing?"

"Hi Saskia, I'm okay." He croaked whilst extending his hand out to me. I quickly held it and sat down on a chair next to the bed.

"Glad to hear it. You gave me quite the fright but I knew you were brave. I knew you would make it." He smiled at my statement, liking the idea of being a strong young man.

"Did dad tell you I saw a deer before it happened? It was amazing." I was astounded at the pure innocence of the little boy. He had just been shot but was still excited by the small things life still had to offer. "He also told me you guys found Sophia, is she okay?" My eyes widened and I sucked in a short breath of surprise. I was at a loss of what to say.

"Um..yeah she's fine. She's good." I explained awkwardly, scratching my head.

"She's not back is she? I had a feeling dad lied." He stated as I saw the glimmer of hope fade from his eyes.

"I'm really sorry Carl, I'm sure he just didn't want to worry you. She'll find her way home, I promise." He slowly nodded his head at my reasoning, seeming to understand.

"Thanks for coming Saskia, you're a good friend." I grinned widely, touched by his words. I quickly said my goodnights and walked out of the house towards my tent. As I did so I felt a pair of eyes watching me and I looked up to find Daryl standing across from me in the distance. I froze in my spot, remembering what I had thought about earlier. Was now the time to tell him?

Daryl's POV

I had just reached the tents in our campsite when I saw someone leaving the farmhouse. I'd be lying if I said my heart didn't skip a beat when I realised it was Saskia. I found myself stuck to my spot just staring at her as she walked towards her tent. All of sudden her head snapped up to look directly towards me. I've been spotted. She seemed to completely freeze as if something was troubling her. After a few seconds we slowly started gravitating towards each other until she was standing nearly directly in front of me. My breathing quickened as her hand came up towards my face and she closed the gap between us...

Saskia POV

I slapped him. Hard.

"You idiot! You scared the hell out of me, I thought we had lost you in that forest forever!" I cried out as I watched him recover from the shock of me hitting him. I was surprised in myself for carrying out such a violent act and tears sprung to my eyes as I realised he was here in front of me after I thought he was dead. He stared into my eyes for a few seconds which felt like years.

"Sask I'm sorry, don't be upset." He said rubbing his already bright red cheek. I felt a pang of guilt as I saw the state of him.

"Oh god what am I doing, I should be apologising. I just hit you!" I blabbed, unsure of what to do with myself as tears fell down my freckled cheeks.

"Hey shh s'fine Sask, I've had worse" He smirked as he brought his strong arms around me. I chuckled slightly at his confession, however, I felt there was a deeper meaning behind it. He pulled away slightly, wary of anyone watching.

"Listen, there's something I gotta say." He admitted. My head cocked to the side in confusion.

"Really? I kind of had something to tell you too actually.." I trailed off suddenly losing confidence in myself. "..but you go ahead." I insisted. He cleared his throat and started shuffling awkwardly on his feet. Is Daryl Dixon nervous?

"Well thing is...I don't really know how to say what I mean..but you're...well...I kind of maybe.." He stumbled over his words continuously and I couldn't help but smile slightly at the adorableness of it. My heart was beating harder than I thought was possible as I anticipated what he was trying to say.

Daryl's POV

This was so much harder than I thought. It didn't help that she had a to-die-for smile plastered on her face as I tried to tell her. My palms were sweating and all I could hear was blood pumping through my body. I let out a big sigh and straightened my posture to try and regain my confidence.

"What I'm tryna say is that, we've become kinda close, and we look out for each other. And well I think I l..."

"ALRIGHT EVERYONE GATHER AROUND WE GOTTA TALK!" Rick bellowed out behind me in the distance. We both let out a sigh of defeat as I knew our conversation had to end.

"We had better go." Saskia reluctantly suggested as she walked past me towards the gathering of people.

Dang it.