Piece by Piece

8

Mar. 4

Dear Corinne,

After I told you, you sat there, eyebrows knitted together, trying to figure out what to do. That's when I placed the stack of letters on your desk, my hands shaking and my breath escaping at a rapid pace, leaving my heart beating frantically to catch up.

You picked up the stack, slowly, carefully, and began to read. I sat there, leaning on my hands, watching your expression. After reading a few, you set them down and the look on your face was so painful.

You (whispering): Leigh

And you started to cry. And I didn't know how to make it stop. So I sat there, horrified as you scrambled to pull yourself together, but it was too much effort, and we both dissolved in tears.

Once we had calmed down in our own little worlds, you cleared your throat, and then (shakily): Leigh. When I was in high school, I starved myself and ended up in the hospital.

And the look on your face told me the rest.

In the next few days I saw a doctor and was admitted into psychiatric care for teens. I stayed in bed, partly because I was ashamed, but mostly because I felt sick to my stomach ALL THE TIME. They fed me three colossal meals a day and snacks- and most of the food didn't even taste good. The first few times I threw up not-on-purpose, and they gave me a drug to suppress my stomach.

They got me back up to 110Lbs.

I can't believe it. All that suffering and I'm back where I started.

Love,

Leigh