Silent (Scomiche)

I Miss You

This had some spelling errors, so I had to go back and fix them really quick. Sorry if you had to read it with the errors, but I took care of them now.

Happy.

Scott needed to be happy. As hard as it was, he was managing to atleast leave the expression that he was okay.

In all honesty, he was hurting.

He couldn't even think of how fast things changed, one night Mitch was telling him he wanted to kiss him, and the next he was saying he didn't care about Scott and was calling him "sad".

And it hurt.

He never knew what people meant when they said that things hurt, but now he did. He thought it was that they were sad, and they felt horrible.

But now he knew. He knew that it was an actual pain, right on the left side of his chest, towering over his heart. Every time it beat, a sickening pain came along with it, almost telling him to make it stop beating.

But he wouldn't go that far, not because of some boy he wanted to forget as soon as he graduated.

Scott wasn't sure if he could forget Mitch as easily as he wished to. Thinking of it, he couldn't forget anything at this school. It went from being the best thing that happened in his life, to one he wishes never happened.

He would've never met Mitch if he was still at private school, with the same people that he couldn't stand, but had been so used to being around.

He had even thought about going back to private school, where he could deal with his academics and not worry about boys.

You see, being gay was not really something to be proud of at his old school. You'd be made fun of, the teachers thought you were insane. But now, Scott wouldn't mind going back.

Because he hated this drama.

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Mitch: Can we talk?

Scott looks at the text, not sure how to reply or if he should even reply at all. Maybe he wanted to say he would break up with Travis to be with him. Scott knew that wasn't going to happen.

Scott: Idk

Mitch: Please?

Scott: Talk.

Mitch: No, like in person. Can I come over?

Scott: No.

Mitch: Please, Scott. I have to talk to you because if I don't, I'll never forgive myself.

Scott: No.

Mitch: Scott. Why not?

Scott: Cause I'm not about to release all my fucking emotions in front of you.

Mitch: I'm not one to judge.

Scott: I don't care.

Mitch: Please. I want to apologize in person and explain everything. I miss you.

Scott: Really? You miss me? Kinda thought it was a one way thing at first because I thought for sure you wouldn't miss me. It seemed like you didn't give a shit about me now that your asshole boyfriend was back but, hey, who am I to tell you how to live you life? If you want to make others feel like shit, I can't stop you.

Mitch: Please let me come over. You're making me feel worse.

Scott: You should feel worse.
Scott: I'm sorry. I didn't mean that.

Mitch: I'm never going to forgive myself.

Scott: So if you come talk to me, you'll forgive yourself? That doesn't necessarily mean I'll forgive you.

Mitch: I know. Does that mean I can come?

Scott: You get 15 mins.

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Scott opened the door, refusing to make eye contact with the boy. He slowly walks in, following Scott upstairs and into his bedroom.

Mitch grabs his notebook from his bag, along with a pen.

It's been awhile since I've been in here.

"And I thought you would never come back."

Did you want me to never come back.

"I wanted believe that, but no, I wanted you to come back. Really bad."

Can I hug you?

"No."

Oh. Okay. I understand.

"You said you needed to talk to me."

I do. I need to apologize. About those texts. I didn't mean anything, I was just pissed off because Kirstie tries to rule my life, like she owns me. She doesn't and I wanted her to get that, but all I did was end up losing all of my friends because of some stupid shit I said.

"It was pretty stupid. You had no right to bring any of us up, especially like you did."

I know, Scott. I regret it so much.

"Did you really have no feelings for me that whole time? Did you use me, because that's something I need to know. You acted like you did."

I didn't use you. I promise.

"Then why the fuck would you say that shit on the texts! "Fuck Scott! It's sad if he can't get over me!" How was I supposed to take that? I admitted all of my feelings to you, and you just fucking threw it away like I didn't say anything to you. Do you know how bad that hurt? How many times I woke up and told myself to not let it look like it affected me, even though it did."

I know. I'm so so sorry. I shouldn't of said that stuff, because I don't mean it. I'm having troubles getting over you myself...

"That's bull shit. Don't even tell me that."

It's the truth, and that is what you deserve right now.

"No." Scott says. "What I deserve, is someone who isn't going to leave me as soon as there ex comes back. Someone who cares about my feelings like I cared about theirs. Someone who will put me first, and love me. And that obviously isn't you. So don't tell me you can't get over me, because we both know you got over me in hot second."

Scott... Please stop

"I think you should go."

Scott, let me explain.

"No! I want you to leave." Scott wipes his eyes, no longer able to hide his tears. "I shouldn't of let you come in the first place." Mitch nods.

I don't think you get how sorry I am.

"I don't think you get how bad you hurt me. Get out." Scott snaps, wiping away some of his tears. Mitch does the same, looking down to the ground and grabbing his belongings.

Scott lets him out the front door, his back against the door when he shuts it. He slides down so his knees are at his chests, regretful of how he had managed to make his senior year.