Soundtrack Of Our Lifes (A Jacksepticeye Fanfiction)

Saviour

Part II. Can't believe I actually write again.

Song is Saviour from Black Veil Brides. Enjoy!
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I wake up, lying on the floor next to my bed. The blanket is wrapped around me tightly. I struggle to free myself out of it. As I stand up my head starts to hurt like hell. Pain killers would do, in the kitchen I find some.

Slowly I walk back to my bedroom and look at my phone to see a new whatsapp message.

Snoops/Sean: Let's meet at the lake near your house. There is a bench right next to the little forest. Face yourself to the east, and remember: don't look! I'll be around at half past four.

Me: Kay... as you wish, master.

Snoops/Sean: Oh, you're awake. I'm dead nervous. Please promise me to not look at me till I say so.

Me: I'll promise.

The clock tells me I need to hurry. While I shower I'm starting to get nervous myself. We know so much from each other. I feel so save when he writes with me.... what if we can't get along when we meet in person? What if he won't come? In my dreams I saw this meeting a thousand times. And everytime it was fluttering.
Some people say it's crazy feeling so much attached to a person you met online. But in my heart I know he is the one for me, my saviour.

We never spoke of this topic. We made our jokes and we made our flirting. But none of us ever talked about the feelings we have for each other. Like there is no need for any emotions. I can only speak for myself... I somehow really love that guy.

After the shower I dress myself in a black hoodie, a casual blue jeans and my black converse shoes with the purple laces. I don't even bother to put makeup on. I never do, it's not who I am. I am the plain grey (well... black) mouse no one really looks at. And, to be fair, there is nothing special about me to look at.

I go out of my door and light a cigarette. I pull the black hood over my head and slowly make my way through the town. It's really crowdy today, I wonder how Sean is feeling with his social phobia. It will not be easy for him. But he'll make it. He is stronger than he thinks. He just needs the courage to try.

Eventually I arrive at the spot he decided we should meet. I obey again and sit down as he wants me to. I light another cigarette, inhale the bitter smoke deep to my lungs.

'You still can't quit, can't ya?' With the words I feel someone sit down in my back, leaning onto me.

'Nah... told you so.' I smile a little. He made it. 'I'm proud of you Sean... you made it.'

I hear him inhale deeply. 'Well.... yeah. Maybe... I should tell you something about that phobia thing.' He leans his head back, his head bumping into mine, resting there. 'I am not that phobic I told you...I just... well, most people don't see me as I am.'

I sigh. Another lie. I can't stand to be lied on. Instead of going berserk I say nothing.

'I'm sorry...' he reaches to my right hand, which hangs to my side, grabbing it. 'I really am... you don't deserve to be lied on. But I... how can I explain?' I feel him shrug.

'You don't have to, if you can't, just answer me the question if you lied to me in other things too.' I rub my forehead, inhaling smoke once more, before I throw the cigarette on the ground next to me.

'I swear to the holy god of spaghetti, no I did not. It hurted so much lie to you. I promise I won't do that again.' He fiddled with my fingers, then I feel him shift his weight, and in an instant I can feel his head on my shoulder. He continues fiddling with my hand, making me nervous. My heart is pounding so hard, I'm sure he'll hear it. But, I can feel his heart too, it's racing in his breast, rythmically pounding against my back.

A few minutes there is no speaking. We just cherish the moment. He let go of my hand and wraps his arms around me, pulling me closer to him. For a moment it is full heaven, then my anxiety kicks in. My whole body stiffens, but he just let go, giving me the space I need.

'Calm down, you choasmonster. Geez, you ruined it now.' He nudges me lightly on the back and I can hear him chuckle. I push myself with a little force backwards, crashing into him. He didn't see that coming, and almost falls from the bench.
I can't help myself but laugh out.