|| New Girl || South Park X Reader Fan Fic

The Wizard King's secret Queen

Wizard King Cartman X Reader: 2

Side Note; {D/H} means dominant hand, if you are ambidextrous pick your favourite hand. 

I flipped my hair up into a long ponytail, holding my {H/L}, {H/C} was a shiny gold band given to me by my love, the amazing Dwarf King Clyde, I was unfortunately picked by him when it came to creating kingdoms. I hoped Wizard King Cartman would protest, but he again chose Princess Kenny over me, I don't even know why I'm jealous of him/her, it's not like I love Cartman.

"My Princess?" Clyde calls for me outside out resting domain. I still don't know why I am only a Princess, when other girls who are considered the King's wife they get Queen, but I guess Clyde has a superiority complex.

"Coming m'lord" I chirp like a princess.

"What?" He calls back to my frustration.

"I'm coming dude?!" I call back slightly annoyed at his pitchy drowned voice. "Woman I still can't hear you? what are you on about now? the toilet seat again?"

"I said 'I'm coming', Jesus fucking Christ, open your fucking ears!" I yell a little less lady like as I storm out of the tree house doors, I shocked Clyde as I death started into his soul.

"Love you dearest" I rushed out with a quick flash of a pretty smile, posing with my hands framing my face.

Suddenly the horns blasted of intruders, we both rush to the edge of the treehouse platform and lean over the railing to see the Wizard King and the Human's Army of Kupa Keep. Out the front of the hoard was Cartman holding his staff up towards Clyde. "We have come to reclaim the Stick of Truth you fucking traitor" he booms as he turns with his arms outstretched to his soldiers, "we're here to fuck your shit up". I giggle to myself.

"We will fight you to the end King of Diabetes!" Clyde yelled as he made his call to his army to attack, "{F/N} get inside, you won't like this" he whispers to me. "I can fight good sir" I bow in honour, he laughs at me. "Princesses' can't fight {F/N}, they're only there to look pretty and bring the King snacks" he scoffed at me. "What about Kenny his fighting?!" I complained back, pointing to the beautiful blonde by Cartman's side. "He's a dude {F/N}?" Clyde spat.

I rushed to grab his sword by his holster in a huff then grabbed hold of a rope swing nearby, "we will not mis-gender people Clyde you fucking transphobic whore!" I screamed before swinging down like a badass down to the fight sword in my {D/H}. I landed in a kneeling position among our men being beat by the humans, "We shall fight to the end!" I called as I began swinging my sword and leading my men.

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The Battle POV:

The battle grew on for what felt like hours, 12 minutes, bodies collapsed to the floor, from being hit too hard by wooden weapons, and blood stained the grass of the battlefield, one kid had a nose bleed. Finally it was down to a duel between Princesses' {F/N} and Kenny, as well as King Clyde and Cartman.

The fight became so intense even the dead bodies couldn't help but look up in bewilderment, Kenny and {F/N} duelled with bow and sword combat, from blocking to minor hits to the forearm and knees, a roaring silence fell to the grounds as {F/N} threw a striking blow to Princess Kenny's side, bringing him/her to the ground in agony. She/he rose his/her hands to her surrender and like that Princess {F/N} had won her place as the superior princess in all the lands, she helped Princess Kenny back onto her/his feet with a friendly pat on the shoulder to say "next time beautiful". 

They both started watching Cartman and Clyde, the battle the two realms both anxiously craved, to see whose King would be crowned, second best, because Kyle was exceptional at battle. The Wizard King and the Dwarf King fought for what felt like days, 28 minutes, Cartman began to pant out of breathe, gasping as he continued to raise his staff to block off Clyde's multi-hit combos from his second, less cooler, sword. "Hey guys, the winner of this battle gets me?!" {F/N} called, she knew it was old fashioned and sexist but she really hoped that Cartman would finally win against the annoying Clyde. 

Cartman raised an eyebrow as Clyde turned to {F/N} with a 'what the fuck' look peering into her soul. Cartman began to gain strength behind his blows and soon had Clyde to his knees begging for mercy. "Alright, but you're taking as prisoner, to clean the stables" Cartman granted as Clyde was taken away in handcuffs. Cartman then turned to Princess {F/N} with a smirk, "so wanna go back to my place?" 

"You thought I was serious?" {F/N} scoffed and brushed him aside as she started helping the fallen men from both side up from the ground. "What? phff.... no... I'm just... fucking with ya" he stammered with red staining his cheeks permanently as he followed {F/N} up the treehouse. 

"I just thought, how fucking funny it would be to ya know take you away from Clyde, cause he'd probably cry like a little bitch" Cartman twiddled his thumbs as {F/N} lead him once again to their chambers so he could once again claim the Stick of Truth. 

"So I'm an object now?" {F/N} playfully side eyed the shy King as the entered the tree house chamber. "Oh no no, Princess, in fact I thought it was super cool how you basically took down like half my army with your orders, they were all like 'no, no, no' and you were all like 'whoosh, whoosh' like a cool Princess" he mimicked through his hands slightly impressing Princess {F/N} as she hid her blushing smiles from him. She opened a little jewellery box revealing the stick to the Wizard King.

"Well, here you go" {F/N} smiled shyly showing Cartman the box, "ah yes, coohl" he started to the ground as she did as well. "Hey M'lord!" A bright voice called from outside the chambers.

"What Paladin?" Cartman called Butters inside with them, "the Dwarfs and I got to chatting and they raised the point that since {F/N} beat Kenny in battle and you beat Clyde, that it's actually a tie" Butters stammered.

The Wizard King's POV;

Oh shit I was hoping it wasn't going to come to this. "Butters shut the fuck up" I subtly whispered to him angrily.

"Well then it should come down to you two... um duelling"

I rubbed the bridge of my nose in frustration, "oh my fucking god Butters" I sighed to myself. "If we must" Princess {F/N} agreed honourably. "That's not fair I can't hit a girl" I protested, I would never hit the beautiful Princess {F/N}. "Very well" she nodded.

"We surrender the Stick to you humans now but be warned, as I claim myself as the new ruler of the Dwarfs, Queen {F/N} and we shall rematch tomorrow at dawn,  the Stick of Truth will barely be placed on it pedestal before it is reclaimed by it's true owners" {F/N} boomed with confidence. She looked so hot taking charge and there was no rule that states she can't gain control of the Kingdom she is in. "Very well M'Lady, we shall see who is victorious tomorrow" I agreed as we shook hands, Butters left the tent to alert the others of what has become of this victory over the Dwarf Kingdom. 

"It is a shame though, I would have liked to call you my Wizard Queen" I confessed silently to her making her blush in shock then fade to a smile. "I cannot betray my people but we shall see after we stop playing fantasy" she leaned in and whispered back to me before planting a kiss on my cheek.

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 I regained my army and with the Stick of Truth in my grasp we headed home to Kupa Keep, I turn for a final time to see my Queen on her rightful place on her own throne. She watched us like a hawk as we finally left her Kingdom.

{F/N} POV:

I smiled to my injured subjects as they began to bow to me. "We shall tend to our wounded and prepare for tomorrow" I ordered as Queen {F/N}, the rightful ruler of the Dwarf Kingdom.