His Miracle

Meeting Jasmine.

"Is it selfish or wrong of me to wish this wasn't happening now?" I say to Jake whilst staring at the television. I don't feel old enough to deal with such a permanent life-altering change. We're sitting on the floor in the living area. Jake's back is up against the couch and I'm sitting between his legs with his arms around me. His chin rests on my shoulder and we both stare aimlessly at the television. It's late afternoon on Christmas Day, and we've decided to give up on trying to force the Christmas cheer.

"No, you're allowed to feel however you want to feel. An unexpected pregnancy is difficult for anyone to process."

"Do you think Pops is right? Are we going to ruin this child because we're so young?"

"Your Grandad was emotional and taken by surprise. He'll come round to the idea. You shouldn't listen to a word he says. For what it's worth, I think you'd make an excellent Mom," Jake's words are spoken softly down my ear. My posture relaxes and I turn to look at him with a smile on my face.

"Really? Even though I come from a broken family?"

"Just because we both came from a dysfunctional family doesn't mean we have to carry it on to our child. We're allowed to break the cycle here."

I marvel at how wise and calm he appears to be approaching the situation. It's a far cry from the Jake Melvin I initially met. Where has this level of calm come from, and how do I experience it for myself? I feel like I've been trapped inside a maze since seeing the positive plus sign on the pregnancy test.

"Aren't you worried about getting it wrong?" I ask him. He blows out a deep breath before looking at me with a subtle hint of fear in his eyes.

"If you want me to be honest with you, I'm terrified. I don't know what kind of parent I'm going to be, but I'll do whatever I can to be a good one."

I bite down on my bottom lip as I imagine Jake Melvin being a father. It wasn't that long ago he was out causing mayhem in town due to his deranged boss, Amil. Since Amil's death, Jake has embraced the quiet and drama-free life. I wasn't expecting him to be so composed.

"How are you so accepting of this? I feel like we both should be freaking out. We're going to have a baby," I say quietly. Jake's eyes connect with mine and he gives me a laid back shrug. A knowing look crosses his eyes but he doesn't share exactly what he's thinking.

"I don't know... Something tells me we're going to be okay. Maybe I'm having a delayed reaction?"

"Yeah, maybe. Are you going to freak out, abandon me and your unborn child when you do finally accept the news?" I question him with a hint of amusement in my voice. Jake laughs and his blue eyes light up with a twinkle.

"You'd make a great single Mom, Wentworth." He winks back at me.

I have no idea if we're going to be okay despite Jake's reassurance. I've always been an overthinker which doesn't bode well with an unexpected pregnancy. I haven't graduated from college yet. How am I going to support a baby? Where will we live? Will I ever build myself a career or will I be known as a teenage Mom for the rest of my life? Will my child grow to hate me like I hate my Mom? My brain begins to spiral into a sea of never ending questions. I release a groan before clutching at the tension building in the forefront of my head. Jake gently wraps his hands around my wrists before lowering my hands. He searches my face and it feels like he's searching through my thoughts to understand me.

"You're really struggling with this, aren't you?" He questions me quietly and there's a distant look in his eyes. I nod my head in response. Jake continues to stare at me for several seconds before he gestures for me to follow him.