The Only Woman He Ever Loved

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Clementine could now sit on top of the carriage comfortably and safely. They had passed the border, according to the map, and Clemy was relieved, shaking her limbs out before crawling up top. She leaned over and patted Wolf lovingly on the back as he began to start back up again, like an old engine on those railroad tracks they started building back in George's side of the world. Clementine could feel George, the distance between them, after they had left the lagoon. It was for the best, she thought, Clemy wasn't that type of girl- she was a wife and a mother.

George decided to sit in the back instead, realizing just how uncomfortable it was between those two trunks. He closed his eyes, feeling sleep take over his body as he sunk to the bottom of the cart, dozing off. He thought about Emma- her soft golden hair, and rosy cheeks. She always looked healthy but just before he had left she had fallen ill. He hadn't received one letter from her or his mother and would suddenly stop breathing, a numb feeling spreads through his body and he begins to cry. He would dream horrible things about his wife dying, or his mother. He didn't know what was happening back home, and there was no way for him to find out.

He loved his wife to be. He had known her since he was a child. His only love. Was that what Clementine and Jackson had? George could remember the story Clemy had told him about when she had first met Jackson. They were both just kids, like him and Emma. The fact that George was even tempted to break something so pure as a childhood love made him feel guilty. He didn't understand these feelings himself but he promised he wouldn't touch Clementine- he wouldn't dare. He would betray not only Emma, but himself if he ever broke that promise.

So George pushed through this longing feeling that seemed to pull him towards Clementine. He fell even deeper into his sleep, the world silent around him, and just his thoughts kept him company. Clementine looked behind her and noticed George fast asleep. She smiled and reached out a hand to pat his head but then decided it would be better if she didn't. She shrunk her hand back and turned her eyes back onto the road ahead. So far nobody had passed by and Clementine was wondering exactly where they were going. She looked around by her feet hoping to find the map she had seen George use earlier. She ran her fingers over bundles of food and a lantern, and other supplies until her hand rested on the old map, rolled up and hidden in the corner of the carriage. She let go of the rains momentarily to study the map. She spread it out on her lap and saw the markings George had made, noticing that, according to the map, they were very far off from the main road. Clementine also saw the large Sawyer signature that was written in the corner of the map, realizing that George must have taken it from the writing desk without permission. Clementine knew that Jackson wasn't particularly fond of George and wouldn't have given him a crumb. She didn't know what to think but decided it was fine anyways. At least they had a map.

As Clementine went to place the map back in it's place something else down there caught her eye. It was a sparkling gold ring that seemed a bit rough on the edges. She knew that it was her wedding ring, Jackson had made them himself, and she had no idea what is was doing in the carriage. Clemy looked at the ring and felt that it would be wrong of her if she didn't put it on in that moment but nobody was watching, so instead she shoved it down the bodice of her dress. She remembered the exact reason and exact day she had put her wedding ring in the writing desk, knowing Jackson would never go looking for it there. It was after another one of their fights they sometimes had and Clementine had gotten so upset that in a rage she threw it in the desk and didn't look back. For awhile she would hide her hand, paranoid that Jackson would notice but as the fighting continued, she didn't care if Jackson saw. Up until now she hadn't really thought about her wedding ring, and bringing back the memories of feeling that way toward Jackson- that rage and that disappointment- scared her.

Clementine didn't know if she should continue to follow the road ahead so she stopped on the side of the road, the afternoon sunlight dimming. The sky was beginning to turn pink and Wolf was grazing in the high weeds near the river. Clemy sat near the edge of the water, ignoring the sleeping George, who was beginning to wake up at the sound of the rushing water.

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