Chaos Creator

Chapter 4: Haircut

I sit in silence in an orchard and watch the sun set by myself. The boy's name was Peter, and he was fine when I left him. I do not know what the fight was about, and I don't aspire to find out. The day passes quickly after the episode that morning, and I have decided to skip dinner for some time by myself.

Out of the corner of my eye I see someone walking. I turn to see Stiff walking towards me, and she quietly takes a seat on the far end of the bench I'm also sitting on. An awkward silence consumes us for us a moment, but then she breaks it.

"How?" She asks quietly.

"What?"

"You're a sadist at one moment and then..." She trails off.

"Then what?"

"And then you're not, from what I heard," She says.

"Obviously, the man you see in initiation isn't the man that goes home. I don't wish to be angry and cruel all the time."

"Oh please, I highly doubt that," She scoffs.

"Well then tell me what kind of man I am."

"You are the type of man to find humor in people's misfortune. You like to watch people suffer. You crave power. You are incapable of loving-" She starts, but I quickly snap at her.

"What makes you think I'm incapable of love?"

"What makes you think you are capable of love?" 

I clench my jaw and watch as the sun slowly dips into the horizon before speaking up again.

"So I don't love my sister, is that what you're saying?"

"That's blood that's different."

"Of course it is," I roll my eyes. 

"A person who loves, does not treat people the way you do."

"I was her initiate trainer, just like Four was to you. She was really good at fighting, it was only a matter of time before she had to fight someone she was going to lose to. I watched him punch, and kick her down until I cut off the fight early. She was still conscious, everyone in the room knew it, but I didn't care. I picked her up and carried her to the infirmary because I wanted to. I needed to," I take a pause to steady my voice."She was so delicate in my rough hands. She was an angel- my angel. And she still is my angel. "

"And that's real. I love her, like Four loves you. But differently," A smile etches on my face. "I don't just hold hands with her of course." 

She turns towards me and glares, but I see a blush creep onto her cheeks. 

"It's like you're two different people," She says quietly.

"Look who's talking."

"Excuse me?" She snaps her head at me, daring me to continue talking. 

"I saw you this morning, attacking that boy. The Stiff back in Abnegation would never pull a stunt like that."

"Well I'm not a Stiff anymore."

"Did you convince yourself that when you cut off all your hair?" I say bluntly. 

"I cut my hair because it was hot."

"You cut your hair to forget whatever you lost. You cut your hair to show that everything is different," I say and she averts her eyes. 

"What, are you my therapist now?"

"Just stating facts."

In the distance, I hear a buzz getting closer and closer. The sound is much too familiar for me to ignore.