After The Fire

Part 15

June 1993

"Lindsey, I changed my mind."

"On what baby?  The pink paint for the walls or the pizza you wanted for dinner?"  

"Funny wise ass!"  We were getting down to the wire.  I am on a hormonal tightrope and I am absolutely giving Lindsey a wicked case of whiplash.  I finally decided we can decorate the room.  We ordered the furniture and it will be delivered at the end of next week.  We, or I, picked out the most beautiful pink paint for the walls and Lindsey finished painting the room last night. 

"I am carrying your baby in me and you are joking about taking food away me!"  I joke and he laughs.  

"What did you change your mind about honey?"

"Caroline." 

"Oh.  Well, Steph, I don't know how to say this, but ready or not, she's coming.  

"You know Buckingham, your humor rears it's head at the strangest times."  He sits down next to me on the couch and rubs his hand across my belly. 

"Princess, " he leans down so he can speak to her, "your mommy is all over the place these days.  Evidently, you are not Caroline anymore, so until we can come with a name that suits our little princess, I will just call you "Princess."  And he kisses her. 

"I am sorry Linds.  This is so much harder than I thought.  I am just not feeling she's a "Caroline".  Are you really set on that name for her?"

"Angel, we've been back and forth for weeks.  Do you want to just wait until we see her or do you want to go back to the list.?"  He's playing with my hair which he knows will soothe me.  I curl into his shoulder.  I really just assumed she'd be a Sara or a Rhiannon.  I think Lindsey thought so too.  He was shocked when I vetoed those right away.  We've been going back and forth for weeks.  We came up with Caroline a few days ago.  I love the name, but it doesn't seem right for her.  I am a mess.  

"I don't know, we still have a little time right?"

"We do.  Let's table it for now.  This is stressing you out and we don't need that."  He kisses me and I immediately relax.  He rests his forehead against mine.  "I need to pick up something at the studio.  I will swing by and get the pizza you requested m'lady.  Why don't you go upstairs and lay down for a bit?  I will be back by 6:30."

"I actually want to go put some stuff on the shelves in her room.  You go and I will see you in a bit."  He moves to get up from the couch and I hold my hands out so he can pull me up.   "Thank you baby."  And I purse my lips for a kiss.  

Lindsey's been gone for about an hour. I've actually gotten a lot done.  We got so many books for her, which makes me so happy.  I always imagined sitting in a rocking chair in my baby's room reading to her.  As I am putting them away I look at them.  Some I remember my mother reading to me.  Some I definitely read to Jessie.  "Princess, you and I are going to spend so much time together reading these books.  I can't wait for you to get here."   I hear the car pull in the driveway.  I just realized how hungry I am. I move to get off the floor and I see it laying off to the side of the pile of remaining books.  Oh I remember this book from when I was a little girl.  I remember on the Rumours tour the first time Lindsey and I stayed at the Plaza hotel in NYC, I told him all about my favorite book when I was a little girl.  

"Steph!  I am home. "  

I make my way downstairs.  So excited.  I have the book in one hand. This is it.  This is her name.  

"Linds.  I have it.  I have the perfect name for our baby."  He looks at me and smiles.  I think he's stopped taking me seriously altogether on this front.  

He moves to pull a chair out for me to sit down and kisses my forehead.  

"Linds do you remember during the Rumours tour when we were in New York City?"  He look at me like I have 3 heads but nods anyway.  

"Yes"

"And you remember the hotel we stayed in?"  Now he looks confused. "We stayed in the Plaza."  Truthfully, I am not surprised or angry he didn't remember.  The last few times we've been in New York, we refused to even stay in the same hotel.  

"Okay?"  He questions and I think he fears I may want to name her after a hotel. 

"And the little girl that lived in the hotel?"  And he's looking at me like I grew a fourth head.   I put the book in front of him.

"Eloise, Linds.  I want to name her Eloise."

"Eloise huh?  Eloise Buckingham"  He looks at me.  I know he doesn't want to commit too much because there is always the risk I switch back to Caroline tomorrow.  But no.  This is it.  This feels right. He leans towards my belly, "so Princess, how do you feel about Eloise.? Eloise?  I like it Steph.  It's different.  Eloise."  

"Really?" 

"I think we've named our baby."  And he kisses me.