Who ? {English Version}

✵t w o✵

It's already been a week since I left the hospital and a week that I don't sleep anymore and that I spend my time in my-, in our bed crying. I hear the door open, I turn around and see my sister Doniya looking at me with eyes showing an emotion I hate, pity.

"Zee?" I don't wanna answer her so I turned my back to the door wishing she left even though I knew she would not. "Zayn we worry about you a lot" I don't wanna talk to her, I don't wanna talk to anyone. "You'll have to get yourself together, Liam wouldn't have loved to see you like that." That's too much." I fliched at the mention of his name and  I suddenly got up and start yelling at her while crying..

"No, now shut up. How do you want me to get myself together after that, after all the shit I'm going through, I lost one of the people who meant the most to me. A week ago I lost a part of myself and all by my fault, I'm the one who wanted to go to the restaurant to ask him to marry me. It's my fault if today he's gone. I'd give everything to take his place. A world without him isn't a world I want to live in, Doniya, do you understand?"

During my "breakdown" I hadn't even noticed that she got closer to end up at the edge of my bed. "Come on, come here." She said with a sweet voice and so much love in her eyes even if I yelled at her. I didn't hesitate a second when she opened her arms to me. I've always loved my sister's hugs but I would've preferred his arms.

She loosens her embrace to finally gently push me away,

"Get up Zayn, at least take a shower while I change your sheets, it smells like death in here." She said that with a movement I would've preferred her not to do, she wrapped her hand around my wrist making me moan in pain quietly. "Are you okay?" She asked worried" I wanted to scream to her and to the entire univers a huge no so freaking bad. "Yes."
"Zayn roll up your sleeves please." She asked with a mix of anger and worry. "Why?" I replied unsure. "Roll them up fuck!" She yelled, I shiver out of fear, when Doniya gets mad she's not the same anymore and in these moments she scares me a little. That's why I slowly roll my sleeves up while looking down then I hear her curse. "When?" She asked but I did not answer. "You better answer me right now Zayn Javaad Malik. She said calmly even if I know that she wasn't. "Since I got out of the hospital." My voice was so low that I wasn't sure that I talked out loud until she responded me. "You fucking promised me that you would never do it again!"
"I'm sorry Doniya." I said saddly "No, I'm the one sorry that you ended up this way!" "But understand that that I miss him." "It's far from being the right solution!" She yelled again.

I look at the floor once more feeling guilty. "You promised me after dad's death that you wouldn't do it again."  I suddenly lookd up at her when hearing her shaking voice to realize that tears were streaming down her face and I felt guilty because these tears are there because of me. "No, don't cry for me." I said with a guilty voice. "But it hurts me to know you're hurt enough to do it again." "I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sor-" She stopped me. "Look at me little brother." I then shyly looked up at her. "Promise me that you will never did this again no matter what happens. He asked me with her hands cupping my cheeks.   "I promise you." "Good."

And for her to believe me I told her that I loved her like when we were kids.

"Muje stumse mahabbat hai" I said to her. "I love you too Zayn, more than anything in this world."

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What's up my people,
Hope you like this second chapter
Leigh.❣