Chapter 8

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~A/N~ I’m listening to Diana and watching A Walk To Remember omg help I might cry let’s see what comes out of this omg

For the past week I’ve been crying myself to sleep, trying hard to read and keep up on my studies but failing and crying again and mostly sitting in my room crying myself to sleep every night.

Today I had woke up, looked at my walls which were covered in One Direction posters, I started crying but then I got ahold of everything and started ripping the Niall posters off my wall not even caring if the paint came off.

How could Niall use me like that, it could be worse he could have used me for sex, gotten into a beat with his friends at the coffee shop. Everything runs around in my mind only making me angrier and I rip the last poster of my walls and then I slide down against it sobbing.

When I finally clear my thoughts I get up, walk towards the bathroom and splash cold water over my face, I refuse to look in the mirror. I open my door and walk down the hallway and into the kitchen, I haven’t left my room all week unless my mom was home and I was forced to come out and eat dinner with her faking smiles.

I suddenly remember the magazine that my mother was reading last week, I grab some food and run to the table and search for it, when I find it I stare at the cover and I feel more tears coming on.

On the cover is Niall and me, kissing.

Before I can cry panic sets in. I check to see if my mom has really read the thing and to my relief she hasn’t, I grab the magazine and rip it to into pieces, I surprising don’t cry while I rip it I just focus on the pain of ripping, like my heart.

I let out a sigh, take my food to my room where I find myself finally reading the final book before I’ll probably work on some online math work.

When I finish a couple of chapters I put the book on my stand and wait for a good show to come on. When Say Yes To The Dress comes on I watch three hours of the show I check the time and I’m disappointed when it only says five. I go back to make me dinner and for once I don’t feel sad.

When it is finally ten I think about ether going to bed or calling Carley up and maybe going to the club, tonight might be the only night I won’t be sad. She answers on the second ring.

“Hello?” She asks and I can tell she sounds tired I let out a laugh.

“I was calling wondering if you wanted to go to the club tonight.” She shifts the phone to the other ear and I wait staring at my nails.

“Who’s that?” I hear a deep voice and I roll my eyes, its Harry.

“Really Carley sorry you must be busy.” I’m a little pissed off so I hang up and sigh as I finally look in the mirror.

I look horrible when was the last time I showered or did my make up? I take a quick shower and while I wash my body I decide I’ll go to the club alone, I’ll just call a cab to take me instead of walking and I will have fun, I will not be sad anymore, I’m tired of being sad over Niall.

Quick sadness washes over my body but I shake it off, jump out the shower and blows dry my hair. I apply dark make-up, darker than I’ve ever worn and pick out a tight blue dress that I can’t even remember where I got it from, I look around in my mom’s room for some high heels and when I find a nice black pair I leave, I touch up my make-up and grab my phone and bag and march out the door calling the nearest cab.

I’m picked up and dropped off at the front of the club in ten minutes, even if I’m not 19 yet it seems the big, bald guy at the front thinks I am and lets me in without any talking on why he should, I smile to myself and the first place I walk towards is the bar.

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