He's That Thug

♥ Chapter Ten ♥

When I was seven, I broke my leg. I was in the playground right next to my school. All my classmates were there as well as my teachers.

My friend, Shanell, and I were climbing theonkey bars, laughing and playing around with each other.

"Ha! Beat you!" I laughed, sticking ny tongue out at her.

"Whatever, Annie." Shantell smiled, pulling herself up and sitting on top of thr bars. "Come up here; on top the mobkey bars!"

I laughed and carefully climbed up. We sat up there, goofing around with each other when I saw a fiel around my age, crying on the floor, a crowd of students surrounding her.

I stood up, trying to stay balanced, to get a better look. "Shantell, that girl! They're being mean to her." I posted and crouched down, getting ready to jump off.

"Annie, be careful! You're shoes--they're unti--"

"Ahh!" The loud scream came me. Next thing you know, I was on the ground, my leg twisted in a odd angle. I bawled on the floor, the pain unbearable for a child. The crowd soon formed around me and gasps erupted from their mouths.

The girl they had been teasing before, gave me worried look before running to a teacher and pointing at me. The tea her rushed over and called the ambulance. The girl had stayed with me the whole time, making sure I didn't feel alone as all my friend's resumed their fun. Even Shantell went back to swinging on the swings without me.

I never saw that girl again.

My father was pissed. He hater medical bills and attention; two things he had to worry about after my accident. Now thinking about it, staring up at Anthony eyes wide, I realized just how many kind people I have in my life.

I admit, I've had some pretty low points in my life. But it's not horrible.

"Anthony, why did you kiss me?" I question, staring at him in awe.

He shuffled on his feet and looked away. This was the first time he seemed embarrassed. Which was weird, based on his cocky and thugginsh persona.

He then cocked his head to the side. "You must really hate me, huh?"

Might as well not lie to him. "I'm not your biggest fan, no."

He gave me a half-hearted smile and sighed. "You know, maybe if you gave me a chance in the beginning, things would've been different."

I shrug. "Do you mean I wouldn't have been raped? Sorry, I had no idea that affected you so greatly."

"Please, let's not start another argument." He crossed his arms over his chest. His phone ran and he flipped it out and answered without checking to see who was calling. "Hello?"

His eyes fell on me and he quickly moved away. "...yeah, I guess."

I strained to hear the conversation.

"Vincent, we had an agreement. It's time you held up your end of the deal." Anthony paused before growling. "No. You've done enough. Look, you've had your fun, just let me out."

Out? What deal? What the hell were they talking about?

"Vincent, I don't care. I just want out. I did everything you asked. Got to her. Talked to her. Befriended her. Then you came in and--"

I moved away without hearing the rest. Oh my God, did he know that Vincent was going to rape me? Had it been pre-planned?

I felt my heart break. Trust was so hard to earn. He'll never earn mine. I stared at the floor in utter silence.

"Can we finish this later? I'll call you." Anthony paused and then muttered a bye, hanging up the phone. I presas my fist to my mouth and inhaled sharply.

Anthony stalked back over to me, and I felt the tears threaten to spill over. I wrapped my arms around myself, siddently feeling sick and dizzy.

"I-I need to get to class." I turned around to walk away, but I felt his hand grip onto my arm and gently pull me back to him. "Anthony, stop. You have said and done enough, now, I just want to go to class and learn."

He looked at me, and his expression softened. "I shouldn't feel for you, you know. I fucking hate it. I shouldn't like you or want you, I shouldn't give a fuck about you but I--I do." 

I looked down.

"And you don't even understand. I'm in a gang, Roxie. I've done things. I've robbed people. I own a gun. I've killed someone in cold blood, and I don't give a fuck about all that, but you--you, it's different because i care about you and I hate it."

I looked up,  eyes wide. Killed someone? "Who?"

"Excuse me?"

"Who was it--who did you kill?"

He shook his head. "That doesn't matter. My point is that you don't get to judge me. You don't get to make me seem like the bad guy with no feelings or no heart because I do have feelings and I do have a heart because I do like you."

I pushed him away from me. "You are not a good guy. That's my point. I don't need to judge you. You just admitted to--to murder. You are not a good person, so no matter what I feel, or what I think, or what you feel or think, I can't care or like you because you are incapable of giving up this horrible pathetic lifestyle. A gang, Anthony. That's you're problem, that's what you need to get out of. I have my own problems, my own worries. I have my own pain and my own weaknesses. I don't need to add you to that list, because I'm so sick of that list and everything and anyone on it."

He stayed silent, staring at me with annoyance. "You think I want this? When I joined a gang--you think i wanted to?

"Didn't you? Did they force you, Anthony, did they make you do something you didn't want? Or are you so much of a pussy, that you can't stand up for your fucking self?"

"They threatened my family. My mom, dad, my sister, all of them. i did something, they found out, and threatened my family's life. The only way for me to keep them safe was to be on the inside. For me to be one of them. So no matter what you think of me or what any one thinks of me I'm not in a  gang because I want to be. I'm not in there for the money or the bitches or the guns or anything but to keep my sister safe."

I felt my heart stop. "Anthony--"

"Don't. His voice was dark and cold. "Don't pretend like you care, Roxaane, because we both know you don't."

I gripped onto his arm right before he could walk away. "I'm scared, okay? My life is a mess. I literally have nothing to live for. Suicide consumes my thoughts. I have nothing and noone. You have a family that loves and cares for you. i have a drunken dad who spits in my face!" I sigh. "We have fucked up lives, okay? I judged you because I wanted--no, i needed--something good in my life. Gang doesn't exactly scream good. I'm sorry, okay?"

Anthony took a deep breath. "You should get to class." He turned around made his way down the hall.

"Anthony!"

He paused and turned to look back at me.

"Can you meet up with me? Afterschool? Please?"

He thought about it then nodded. "Yeah. Sure."