Sweater Weather.{Troye Sivan Fanfic}

Chapter 5.

It is Troye.

I wanted to cry, breakdown, yell, hug him, talk to him, leave. With all these emotions inside of me, all I could think of was his question 'Is that you Savanna?'

Normal people, would answer with a simple 'yes' and have a conversation. On the other hand, whereas i cannot bare do that, i would die and just have a mental breakdown, Troye would think I'm crazy and needed help, so that is not an option.

I can't let Troye have the advantage in this... This... Relationship? No, thats to far... Situation. Yeah, that sounds right for the moment. So what can i do that won't make me sound so vulnerable? Will i even appear vulnerable with my tattoo's? I don't what he's thinking, I know he's waiting for an answer from me now. I should keep him waiting, or nod and leave rudely, although i wouldn't be able to leave the hallway rudely, myself would become clumsy and trip over my own feet, down the stairs.

'Yea, it's me Troye. Been a long time eh?' I smirk at him, this seems edgy and friendly. Its worth the risk, sooner in the future, there is going to be a moment where i wished i had said something different. Maybe it would change everything that would happened in my future... Could this now effect Eleanor? I could drag him into her major problem and get him killed!! No, Savanna, don't say that you can't bare to think of that.

I looked, at Troye's face with a playful smile. No. This isn't right, i should stay expressionless, I have to fight my vulnerability, I'm only human though.

But with power and control... I could make him fall down from his oh-so-safe-haven. That's what i need to do, have power over him and control, it's a cruel card to play but it'll get me far enough without anyone catching me slipping with these lies, my mouth can't hold back any longer.

'Yea, it has been.... I've seen you've um... Changed.' He states. Staring at me. My tattoo's taking them in so carefully.

'Harmed your body practically...' He mumbles under his breathe. Troye doesn't think i hear him? That's amazing, why should he even care what i do to my body?

'It's my body, i can ink it if i wanted too. You aren't the boss of me Troye.' I snap out. 'I'm also not death, i can perfectly hear.' I storm out of the hallway to downstairs.

Why did i agree to this? Eleanor surely will be paying back for this.

Speaking of Eleanor, she sat on the couch, talking to Mrs. and Mr. Sivan. Probably about plans to help us to afford a 'dorm.'

Rubbish. Absolute rubbish.

'Savanna, there's food in the kitchen if you changed your mind about being hungry.' Eleanor says as she faces me. I nod.

I'm not hungry. What was even going to do before i saw Troye? Damn, i forgot, whatever I'm sure it'll come back to me at some point.

The only thing i can think of to do, is sit and stare at nothing, so i headed back to the room i was previously sleeping in. I'm so ever bored and can't think of anything to do!

That is until Troye places his hand on my bare shoulder. I jumped and turn to face him. Taking him in properly, he's a stick, skinner then i am for sure, tallish, and innocent looking.

'Jesus Christ. Never scare me like that again! Anyways what the hell do you want anyways!?' I spit at him, even i don't know why I'm so moody now. Troye looks at me... Confused.

Of course he's confuse, I'm probably the most difficult person alive when my mood swings appear.

'Sorry... I just wanted to know if you... Wanted to eat....' He's shaking in my presence, this brings a small smirk to my face.

He looks up to me, and there we stand eye to eye.... His eye's are seriously the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life.

Once again as usually when i see his eyes. I'm falling for his eyes. They aren't falling for mine. We don't know each other yet.

I'm just a troublemaker towards him.

He's good, i always try to pull him away but he drags me back. How does he do it? Seems as he has poison in his eyes, everything about him is always stuck in my head. I swear to God he's giving me a heart attack.

Run as fast as you can now, don't be foolish. My mind tells me, i should, maybe i can trick El into moving somewhere else...

I sigh.

'Well then?' He questions. Wait what did Troye even ask me? Oh for dinner...

'Um yea ok, i guess.' I tell him. He nods, and awkwardly leaves. That was awkward. Very.

I make my way down to the dining room, i see Troye is making his plate, I grab a plate and take barely anything. We walk to the table and sit across each other.

Obviously there's a tension in the air around us.

'So... How's life?' He asks.

Really? Out of all things he asks that? That's some crap question, i feel sorry for myself having to hear that.

'Couldn't you have asked something... Better?' I tell him calmly.

'Oh I'm sorry, i just want to know how a dear friend has been after i left. What's so hard about that.' His comment angers me, rage fills up within me.

I slam my fork on to the table in anger.

'Listen. You want to know how I've been? Lately it been pretty shitty for me Troye, you clearly don't care although, you never did after leaving me for England, your life. Pathetic.' My voice raises at the end.

'It wasn't my choice to leave Australia! And you know that! Is that your fucking problem? You think I left you, not everything is about you Savanna, you still carry that trait where you think everything's only about you and it drives me insane!' He snaps at me. How did we go from an awkward calm conversation to fighting?

Oh, me.

'YOU COULD HAVE ASKED TO STAY TROYE! You never think for yourself, its about everyone else, you're fucking easy like that. I'm surprised you're not smuggling drugs for someone now!! And that isn't my damn problem, its you! You're my problem, for fuck sakes!'

He's really now pushing me to the limit where i want to break anything in this house.

'You know what? You're a dick, all asked how life was and you make a damn scene out of it. You're pathetic if anything.'

Ouch? No, he's right I am being pathetic. So i answer his crap question.

'Oh how's life? I don't know it pretty crap at the moment, I don't even know why I'm here, wasting my time, I should still be in jail mopping around, you know what, why do you care!?' I groan in frustration, and throw my plate to the floor.

It shatters into tiny pieces, food flies in different direction. I'm done.

'Good Day to you.' I storm out of the dining room and grab my sweater, I'm stop at the door by Eleanor.

Now, she glares at me, her body is tense. 'What the fuck was that yelling going on?! Jesus Savanna!' I push her out of the way 'Go away. I just want the world to go away now. To disappear is my wish!!' I open the door and slam it shut.

Its a cool night, I'm glad i brought a sweater now.

I don't know even know where to go. I'll just go anywhere away from here.

Away from Troye Sivan.

(A/N; Shit chapter sorry i had no ideas)

Fuck guys im sorry for not updating in LITERALLY the longest time ever, omg hate me im so sorry guys but keep voting, comment it means alot? anyways muahhh and do me a favor and read my friends @lollypopANNA 's story and get her to 8k? sorry for no updates .____. im busy ok!