Love Me Back

Chapter 2

December 22

Dear Finn,

Sometimes I almost regret dumping you for Jack.

Almost.

I really loved you, y'know. When I noticed you watch me and Jack on the dance floor, your expression was the thing that hurt me the most. There was a look of despair in your face, and tears prickling at the corners of your light blue eyes.

Then again, I suppose you're inclined not to believe me right now.

Sometimes I have the urge to text you, even if I have nothing to text you about. What's the homework for Calculus? Do we have a test in Lit tomorrow? I type in the message, but my finger never hits "send."

Sometimes I want to pass you notes in class, talking about everything, anything, even if it's nothing at all.

Except I can't.

I chose Jack, and I love him.

...Do I, though?

He cheated on me, after all, two years after graduation. I found him in our apartment, pinning some blonde girl against the wall and kissing her with such effort and desperation that it was revolting to watch.

I loved him, but the question was whether or not he loved me.

Did he?

He was my everything, all of my dreams rolled into one. But you, Finn, you were something miscellaneous, a combination of traits I had never imagined.

Maybe I still love you. Maybe we could have been something if it hadn't been for Jack.

Maybe--if I'm brave enough to say this...Maybe it's not too late.

-Cara