no strings attached :: a.i.

10 : My Only One

It was dark before Thomas and I got done with cleaning the ice cream shop. We would have been done much earlier if he hadn't felt the need to spray me with the hose connected to the slushy machine. We were both covered in fruit flavored ice within seconds.

As I watched Thomas lock up, he asked the inevitable question, "Do you ever plan on talking again?"

I thought for a minute, slowly pulling out my phone to respond, "Maybe."

He looked at me over his shoulder, I smiled sarcastically and he rolled his eyes, "You know that wasn't the answer I was looking for," He shoved his keychain in his pocket before joining me in walking to his car.

Ignoring what he had said, I decided to ask my own question, "How do you handle it? How do you go on every day without him here as if nothing ever happened?"

I looked up at him but he continued to look straight ahead, "That's the thing, Bree," When he said the nick name Luke had given me, Thomas finally looked down, holding my gaze. They both had known that I hated my first name, so they shortened my last name and call me that. "I don't. I just got really good at hiding my feelings. I try to push all of those memories to the back of my mind because I need to stop living in the past and just focus on the present."

I nodded, understanding what he meant. He opened the passenger side door of his old truck for me, and I climbed in. He walked around to the other side and turned on the engine before continuing what he was saying.

"I just keep forgetting to remember that where we have been is who we are. But I don't want to remember anymore."

We sat I silence until Thomas pulled into my drive way. I unfastened my seatbelt but didn't get out of the car. When I looked over at the boy sitting next to me, I could see that he was staring at the Swindle's old house across the street. He slowly looked away and focused on me.

"Business is usually really slow, it would be nice if you could stop by again." I nodded and smiled. He smiled back and I got out of the car. I stood in my drive way and watched him turn the corner.

"Bye," I whispered. My throat felt hoarse and I could feel tears rising up inside of me.

I slowly made my way into the house. Sitting on the bench next to my door was a bouquet of white roses. On it was a card.

I'm sorry for earlier, please forgive me.

-Kyle

I took the flowers and entered my empty house. After filling one of my grandmother's old vases with water, I put the flower in it, placing them on the counter. I stood there and stared at the flowers for a moment. I looked around the spotless house. No one had sat on the couch for months, no one had baked a pie in the oven, and laughter hadn't filled the rooms. As I scanned the room, I caught a glimpse of a face staring back at me.

I crossed the room to the old mirror, hanging on the opposite wall. Inside of it was a familiar girl. But she was not like I had remembered, her eyes showed no sign of life. They stared back into mine as thought taunting me. Without thinking, I smashed my fist into the frame, shards of the mirror cascaded across the floor. A tear slid down my cheek.

I looked down at my knuckles, now bloody.

"Break another mirror just to keep away the stares of another guilty reflex, a refection left in tears."

~~

My Only One is a song by All Time Low go listen to it nOW