Long Gone

9. Worksheets.

It was HIM.

My legs were frozen. My lips were quivering. My eyes were once again glassy with a light shade of blue. I couldn't move. My brain was not working. My heart was beating a bit too fast. I had too many feelings running inside me and I didn't know what to do or even say. I just stood there with a flushed face and a million emotions that he could make me feel at the same time.

I could feel love, adoration, admiration, hate, disgust, shame, sadness, happiness, excitement, anxiousness and a lot more feelings I cannot describe. I still don't know how to react. We both have been standing there looking at each other and I still can see a little bit of hate in those dazzling eyes which hit me like thunder. But there is a lot more in his eyes, they have regret and guilt in them. For a second I just shut the world out and looked into his eyes, those dazzling eyes.

I've always been mesmerized by them. I remember that one time when I wanted to see his eyes and he wouldn't listen.

*flashback*

"Pretty please" I said as I looked at him with the most innocent face I could come up with.

"I told you" He said with his signature smirk. "You will complete a dare"

"Tell me what is the dare and I'll do it IF I think it's not something that would make me break your gorgeous face" I replied while staring into his beautiful hazel orbs. They weren't that clear since his glasses were in the way.

"Okay but you have to do it" He said as he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms in the most adorable way.

"Do I get options?" I ask walking behind him as he pretended to think. I moved my hands into his hair and messed them up as they were sticking up in places.

"Sure. 5" He said and I sat in front of him and raised an eyebrow giving the message for him to continue. Paul was beside him and he fucking knew I like him. I then looked at Paul giving him the message 'Don't you dare say or give him the message about anything'. He just chuckled.

"Give me a blow Job" He said with a smug smile. I looked at him with utter shock. He wouldn't. He knew I never did any of this in my whole fucking life and he knows I wouldn't do it with him although in the back of my mind I did a lot more.

"Options" I said disgusted. He was trying his best not to laugh but I was plain disgusted.

"Um... Fuck me, give me a blow job, give me a lap dance, get naked orrr let me finger you." He said casually. Hell no I wasn't gonna do that. I looked at him with more repulsion. *cough*Man-Whore *cough*

"Sorry that's Ian" He stated. Did I just say that out loud.

"Yes, you said that out loud." He said, but this time I didn't say it out loud. "I know you too well" he laughed.

"Um, how about I kiss you, the best kiss you'll ever have" I smirked and he looked at me as something flashed in his eyes.

"That's what Paul suggested" he replied. I raised an eyebrow at Paul and he smirked. I am surrounded with assholes.

I looked at HIM and he just shook his head while thinking of other dirty things. He started suggesting them an I either felt disgust or hatred. So much for wanting to see those dazzling eyes. I declined each and every one of them.

After half and hour he took up my offer and finally when I gave him a kiss on his cheek I removed his glasses and ran away. Haha. What do you do now you jerk?

He came towards me and I just started running backwards as I thought of an idea and put them inside my shirt. He smirked as he launched himself at me and I sprinted. I know what he was thinking

*end of flashback*

I smiled at the thought but recovered quickly and looked into his deep eyes again. We both just stood there. He looked like he didn't want to let go and I didn't want him to let go. It's like life was playing a joke on me. It always happened. Just when I start to forget him, he shows up with my broken heart, breaking it even more. I know what I should do. I know what I want to do but my heart is too stubborn to understand.

I take a little time to travel his face. His dazzling eyes, his little nose, his plump lips, his chiseled jawline, his curly hair that is crooked into a messy thing. He always ran his hands through them in minutes. I remember how he always used to tell me

' You can't turn down this sexy beast' motioning to himself with his hands.

I remember each ti- NO SNAP OUT OF IT!

I was brought back from my thoughts when I noticed that I had my hand on his cheeks and his eyes were closed as he leaned into my hand. He suddenly opened his eyes and looked at me as he raised his hand up to his face.

I shut my eyes close.

I remember the last time he raised his hand; it was when he slapped me right across my face. Don't be surprised, I told you he did many things to me. I was waiting for him to slap me again like a fucking weakling. I should hit him, I should kill him but I just can't. I won't. I felt a hand on my cheek and cringed but the pain did not come instead the hand just stayed there as the fingers brushed. I don't understand. He didn't slap me. He didn't do anything bad.

I peeked open an eye only to see him look at me with adoration and guilt. But why would he do that? He hates me. I know hate is a strong word but despising is a really small word for what he felt towards me. We were both looking at each other when he suddenly got his presence and warmth away from me and sighed as he walked away.

"What was that all about?" I heard a voice that I recognized as Jess' said. I shrugged.

"So when are you coming back? Kaitlin is also coming tomorrow. She told me that her break is almost over." I asked her and she seemed a little taken aback by the fact that I'm talking to her so casually but she recovered quickly.

"Tomorrow it is" she said grinning as we walked to class.

When I entered my class, he was there. Did I mention he was in all of my classes? Yep, karma's a bitch. But there was something different today, he was not in his usual seat that was away from me but he was in his assigned seat beside me. Due to alphabetical orders we always ended up together.

Like I said, Karma's a bitch.

I just walk over to my seat with the asshole and Oscar the stalker. He still does that but he doesn't have the courage to actually confront me. He'll piss his pants. And then there's Paul, he used to be my best friend. He is this cocky man-whore. Well kinda, he would shamelessly flirt and stuff but he never touched a girl that way even when they wanted, other than his girlfriends of course.

The teacher came in. It was math. The teacher liked me a lot and has known me for a long time. I liked her too and I liked math. I know it sounds weird but I really do like it, it's interesting but obviously we had our moments. She explained something I have already completed since I was more than 5 chapters ahead in almost all my classes. She was now handing out worksheets. Easy-peasy.

As soon as I get the worksheets, I start solving them.

I notice that the person sitting beside me AKA Asshole is glancing at me from time to time and trying to look at my worksheet. I even sense him shift his bench closer to mine from time to time. Right now he is sitting almost beside me.

Purposely I have my hands on the worksheet blocking his view. He is trying desperately to look and I just sit there with an amused smile playing on my lips. After some time of seeing him struggle so hard I put my hands on the side and he looks at me with a smile on his face that says 'Uh'. I ignore him and take out a rough notebook and place it on the desk with the worksheet on the side of it. He hurriedly copies it and I just scribble on the book. This book had a shitload of memories and I've had it since I came to this school.

With the corner of my eye I see him staring at the book dumbfounded. Then I glanced at the book and froze.

Fuck. This page!

It's the page.

*****

The best part of the story will be in the end when i'll reveal a BIG SECRET!! not so big but it's important.
P.S.

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