Saturday Morning

Chapter 15: Always 2nd

Moments later I got it back together and started driving again. I had no idea where I was going but I was just driving, trying to lose myself, but I'm not so sure it was working. The next thing I know I look up to find myself at the hospital where Robin was. I decided to go inside and just say hello.

I fixed my makeup that was smeared everywhere and whipped away the tear marks. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before getting out of the car. I tried to walk calmly but it was clear I wasn't. After what felt like forever I got to Robin's room and I entered the room and closed the door behind me.

The room was silent with the slight hum of the machines and his very faint breathing. I sat in the chair I always sit in and stared at him as I watch his chest slowly rising up and down. I sat there in silence for a while, it felt like I was waiting for something but I just didn't know what.

I finally broke the silence. "Robin. I don't know if you can hear me or not. I miss you, we all do." My sentences were short and concise because I was fighting back tears. 
"The worst part about this is that.... You not dead but you're not alive. The only thing we can do is just have hope. You know I've never really was the best at this hope stuff. That was always you. But I'm trying, I really am. I just want you back."

At this point I let tears lose and was crying uncontrollably. " With you everything's better. And that might sound cheesy but it's true. All my life I've been the 2nd one- the 2nd kid, 2nd wife, 2nd mom, 2nd choice. With you I'm the 1st......1st everything"

After I sat there crying my eyes out, alone, I decided it was time to go out there find who was messing with my family. They better brace themselves because my evil queens coming out in them and no one wants to see that again.