Leaving The Friendzone

Chapter 11: Regrets & Confessions

POINT OF VIEW: Cory Kensington

I shake my head solemnly, before wordlessly turning around and quickly running up the stairs.

I completely lost it.

I lock myself in my room and slunk down onto my bed, which I'd reluctantly made this morning while Ella was waiting outside. That'd been payback for the sweater she'd stolen of mine.

I glance over at my desk, my abandoned homework sits lonely in the middle of it. I don't even feel like doing it anymore. I mean... I never did, but now I can't even convince myself to move from my bed.

So I lay here in a vegetative state, my head sunken into my pillow miserably.

I feel like a total dick. I'm just so pissed off. At myself, at her dad for not being there.

"I know how long you've waited to meet him. To finally have the father that you've dreamt about to come back to you, and... and take you home so you can live together and play happily ever after."

"Cory, what are you trying to say?"

I groan, picking up my pillow from under my head and holding it against my face.

What was I trying to say?

I take a deep breath in, even with the pillow blocking my face from actually getting real oxygen.

I smell Coconut. Ella's shampoo.

With a frustrated groan, I throw the pillow off of my bed and at the door across the room.

"Fuck!" I yell out loud to no one in particular.

After sitting limply for about 2 minutes, I decide to reach out for my phone to put on music, rather than sitting in the bitter silence reminding me of what I just did.

You just caused Ella's and your first fight, you ass.

I dazedly unlock my phone, go to my music library and press the first song that appears.

Eminem- Without Me.

I throw the phone on the bed beside me, shutting my eyes and just laying there.

After the first few verses, there's a knock at my door.

I grab my phone and put my hand over the speaker.

"It's open." I mumble.

A tiny part of me wishes that that was Ella on the other side of that door, but that hope is abandoned when my Mom appears on the other side.

"You're not busy, are you?" She raises an eyebrow, looking over at my desk and my Science homework that I don't see getting finished in the near future.

"Nah." I shake my head as I unlock my phone and stop the music, removing my hand that'd been muffling the sound previously coming from it.

"The pizza came." She opens the door wider, exposing a Domino's pizza box in her hand, before stepping inside and shutting the door behind her, taking a seat at the foot of my bed and setting the food down beside her and taking a look around the room.

"I'm glad you got your need for cleanliness from myself, and not your father." She forces a sad smile as I sit up reluctantly. She opens up the pizza box, but I just shake my head, before she shuts it again.

"...I know I wasn't the person you were hoping to see on the other side of that door." She turns her head toward the entrance to my room, exposing her brown bun that she's always worn her hair in ever since I can remember.

"But then again, I always could read you like a book. Your eyes give everything away." She jerks her chin toward me.

"What? My eyes?"

"Yes, your eyes. They go darker and greyer when you're upset."

"Oh." I nod.

"She went to go stay with her dad for the night at a hotel downtown. Told me what happened with you two. Well... The basics of it." She mumbles.

I nod again.

"Cory." I look up at her. "Talk to me."

"It's all my fault. I got all worked up when I saw her dad, and I just lost control. I feel like such an ass, and I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't even come back for a while." I shut my eyes.

"Oh come on, Cory! You don't seriously believe that, do you? You two have been best friends since you were in Kindergarten. I think she's smart enough and reasonable enough to understand."

It goes quiet for a while, maybe about a minute or two.

"It's not just that, mom."

I pause, and take in a long breath.

"...I-I think I'm in love with Ella."   

As soon as I hear myself admit it, the truth it holds becomes as apparent as the blue sky in the day.

I'm completely in love with Elizabeth Marie O'Connor.

The thought of it makes me want to smile like a total idiot, but then I remember that she probably doesn't even love me back, and she most-likely can't even stand to think of me at the moment.

"I was wondering when you'd say that." She grins widely.

"I don't e-- Wait what?" I snap my neck up to look up at her.

She laughs. "Cory, don't play the fool. Everyone besides you and possibly her knew that already."

"What are you talking about?" I furrow my eyebrows.

She rolls her eyes. "Ugh! Cory! It's obvious that you have feelings for her. I can see it in the way you look at her whenever you two are together. It's strikingly apparent." She raises her eyebrows.

"Wait, mom, you're trying to tell me you knew that I liked her before I did?" I lean forward.

"Oh-no-no-no-no. Cory William Kensington, first of all, you don't like her, you love her. And also, you've known for much longer than you think."

I lean against the wall and reach for the pizza box, wanting to fill my mouth with something other than love confessions for my best friend.

I take a mouthful of a slice of cheese pizza, not saying anything until I've swallowed.

"That still doesn't tell me what I want to know." I shake my head.

"Oh yeah? What's that?" She reaches for a piece too, taking a big bite.

I look around nervously.

"Where is her position in all of this?" I mumble, stuffing my face with more food awkwardly.

She nods slowly and knowingly.

"Oh, my dear boy, I can't tell you that. You've just got to find out on your own." She pats me on the shoulder, before getting up off the bed and leaving the room without another word.