BitterSweet (Editing){Complete}

Chapter Three- The Nightmare

AN: Warning: Dark content ahead!!! >.>

Stephen's (POV)

"You love me, baby, don't you?" my mother asked in a low voice.

"Yes mommy," I replied back nervously watching as she moved closer to me

"Then you wouldn't mind if I touch you here then since you love me so much," She said as her hand grips my thigh. I didn't understand what my mother was doing. All I knew was that it didn't feel right. It didn't feel right as she moved her hand farther along my thigh going to an area that I knew she shouldn't be touching.

"Momma," I said in a wobbly voice "This doesn't feel right..."

"What you mean Tony? I love you, don't you love me." She asked as she stared off into space. It was as if she was here, but wasn't here at the same time.

"Momma, w-w-who's Tony?" I asked. I was beginning to get scared. She was going into one of her crazy phases again where she turned into a different person. Where she turned into a person that wasn't the mother I loved.

"Tony, touch me," she moans out as she yanks my hand from squeezing the covers and put in on her chest, rubbing it around in a circular motion.

"Mom, p-p-please let me go," I cried out wanting to be let free. I wanted my "daytime mom back". I wanted her to come out and whisper soothing words to me. To tell me everything was going to be okay. But however, wishes don't come true. I learn that the hard way that night, as my mother continued to feel me up thinking I was Tony when in reality I was just Stephan. Stephan, a boy who was her son, a boy wishing in that moment...that he could die.

I woke up gasping for air. It felt as if I was drowning in that painful memory. I haven't thought back on my childhood for years now. I tried my hardest to forget that part of me and trap it in the deepest part of my mind, so I wouldn't have to remember. The one thing I hated the most was remembering...remembering my mother. I laid on my bed in a fetal potion trying my hardest not to scream out in agony. It was as if I was a little boy again; weak and afraid, just praying for a miracle that would never come. I stuff my pillow into my mouth to quiet down my sobbing. I couldn't help it. My body was shaking uncontrollably, and the tears were streaming down my face. I shut my eyes extremely tight and began clawing at my face, trying to erase the memory.

"Deep breaths, take deep breaths," I thought as I tried to calm myself down. However, trying to calm down was like depriving the world of water, a slow process.

I couldn't have my adoptive parents finding me in this predicament. I didn't want them to know of my rare panic attacks that sneaked up on me randomly. I turn myself towards the window and stared off into the night sky, watching the moonlight glisten throughout my room.

"I wish, I wish on a moon so bright, that the stars above can take my life," I whispered and began rocking myself to a slow melody as I talked to the moon.