Entangled

Chapter 3

Stream of salty water rolled down my cheeks as I read the letter.
"Hareem! It's about the trust that Nushay didn't have in you because of my eyes that were playing with hers, it's about your weakness that I knew from which I want to break you down, it's about a black silk cloth that's been wrapped around Anushay's eyes, so she could be blindfolded. It's about those granules of love your heart poured on her but I made a mixture of them. It's about those sealed envelopes of silence that will make screaming noises now.
Hareem! I want you to know the truth, a truth of our relationship that Nushay hid from you. We have been sharing a very close bond of love for about 3 months now. I don't know why I'm telling you this. The hidden truth behind "For your eyes only" is that Nushay love your pretty brown eyes and like every eye has a story to tell I want a story of tears in them, a story of Blood tears that will shatter you apart."
Regards,
Your well-wisher.
I started screaming so loud that my mother came outside
"What happened Hareem? Are you alright? Why are you screaming?"
But I, I wasn't responding. I was speechless, breathless.
She took that letter from me and as she tried to read it, I snatched from her and ran away to my room and closed the door.
Hours passed, Phone beeped again and again. My family was continuously knocking on the door and every single memory was running like a waterfall of despairs and happiness in front of my eyes and I, I was alone in the dark room crying and laughing on my own existence. Coverless walls scared me. Those slippers Nushay gifted me were like thorns. Those letters, cards, gifts she gave me was pretending to be a nightmare that would never end. Murmuring of dried petals of roses, she gave me was so horrible. Those open windows gave me suffocated air. Those empty wrappers of chocolates I saved as a memory of Valentine gifts she used to give me were themselves leaving my treasure of happiness and yes, every corner of my room and every single memory I spent with her was killing me.
I was looking in crystal clear mirror in front of my bed, "Mirror reflects what you place in front of it but that day it was reflecting my ruined soul. A soul that was hollow and had no tendency to love and to be loved again.
Hours passed, and the evening turned into horrifying night, but my eyes couldn't stop bleeding. Stars full of burning gases had a glimpse of black coal light. The furious wind was taking every broken piece of my heart with it. Dried leaves were rattling with sadness. Thunders of memories were flashing with horror. Those black curtains were symbolizing an end and my body, it was lying like a violent soul that was broken so well that its pieces couldn't be fixed again and suddenly, my mind caught a thought, A thought that I used to see on butterfly walls at Nushay's place. She didn't even know what it meant neither did. A quote that I never understood but that night it was symbolizing my situation.
"When you emboss yourself with butterfly colors, it takes away all other colors of your existence"
And yes, that butterfly with prettiest wings were taking all colors of my life. My existence was fading.
I don't remember when I fell asleep but when I woke up, my pillow had a big tear stain on it. I could hear myself breathing heavily. My heartbeat felt like a drum that was constantly playing near my ears. I changed the side of the pillow and FINALLY came out of the room with a fake smile hoping no one would notice my eyes.
"You okay?" Amma Asked.
"Ummm yeah"
"you look upset. Didn't you sleep last night? Your eyes, why are your eyes red? You cried Hareem? What was in that letter? Why didn't you open the door?" Amma kept asking these questions but I, I wasn't listening. My mind was still stuck with that letter.
Amma tried her best to make me feel comfortable. She made me heart shaped pancakes with whipped cream and strawberry topping. I only took two bites and went back to my room to take a shower. While I was heading towards the washroom, I saw that letter lying on the dressing table.
"Who could have possibly sent this? What does this person have to do with me? Why didn't Nushay tell me? Why is Nushay in relationship with someone who wanna see tears in my eyes? Who could it be?
OH, DEAR GOD. It's AZLAN!!!
Nushay is in relationship with Azlan. That's right, He always hated me for some unknown reasons. He once said He'll take revenge, but I didn't know he'd use Nushay. She always had a crush on him.
Why Azlan? Nushay clearly knows he's not a nice guy. How long they've been dating each other? Why is she hiding everything? "All these questions flooded my mind.
I stood there for a while not wanting to look at the letter but not wanting to look away either.
That's when Amma came in and reminded me of New Year Eve dinner that I totally forgot. For the first time in my life, I was not even slightly excited about New Year. That letter literally turned my world upside down, how can I be excited about something?
Amma took that dress out of the cupboard and said
"Nushay does have a great choice. You both will look so pretty in this"
Later that day, when Amma was finally done with arrangements, she came to check on me. I was still in my PJs. She gave me that 'why aren't you ready yet?' look. I smiled and asked her to give me some time.
I kept looking at the dress for more than 10 minutes and started finding something else. I needed something simpler to wear. I didn't wanna be the center of attention that night.
After 5 minutes, someone started banging on the door. On hearing Nushay's voice, I opened the door. I came out of my room wearing a very simple light pink dress.
"What's wrong with you? Why aren't you ready yet?" She gave me weird look.
"I'm ready" I smiled and went straight to the kitchen. She followed me there
"Why aren't you wearing that dress? What happened?"
"I'm ready, Anushay, okay? Now, excuse me for a moment"
"Are you mad at me? You never call me Anushay, what's wrong? Did I do something wrong? Tell me Hareem? Is that why you are not wearing that dress? Say something."
I shook my head and went to my room.
After a while, I came outside and handed that letter to Nushay. She opened it quickly, but her face turned expressionless as she read.
"His name is Azlan, Right?" I broke the silence.
"Thi... This letter is fake" she stammered.
"What about your relationship with Azlan? Is that fake too?"
"I can explain, I'll tell you everything but this letter, Azlan didn't send this"
"Azlan and I have studied in the same class for more than 3 years, you think I can't recognize his writing?" My voice tone changed.
"No.... no...No he can't do this to me, to you" She shouted.
"He can, and he will" I smiled.