I haven't seen Harry for over a week and it's been nothing but torture. I didn't realize how strong my feelings were before I told him to leave. Niall has been doing whatever he can to make our relationship closer. I've been acting like I actually want to be with him so that I don't break his heart by letting him know how unhappy I am. I care about Niall but more like in a friend way. I know it's not good to do this to him or even to myself but this is what he wanted, to be with me and stay away from Harry. I don't know how much longer I can last though. I need to see Harry. I need his arms to be wrapped around my neck as our lips press together and have his fingers link into mine as we talk and laugh together. The more I think about Harry the more I miss him. I can't do this to myself. It's only been a week and I'm already dying inside. This isn't healthy to want to be with someone this badly. I have to use all of the strength in my body to keep myself from walking out of the door and running into Harry's arms.
You know what? No.
I want to be with Harry and I can be with him if I want. He's everything I've ever wanted in a guy. I need to see him and I'm going to see him. I need to stop feeling so guilty for what I did to Niall and let myself be happy. I can't do this anymore.
I stood up from the couch after thinking through everything and grabbed my keys walking out the door to my car.
I can't stay away from Harry any longer.
I walked through Harry's door without knocking. He wasn't in the living room so I walked upstairs and into his bedroom. He was sitting on his bed with his legs crossed with papers spread around him and his face in a textbook. He quickly looked up at me and his eyes grew wide. He shut the book he had previously been focused on and stood up from the bed.
"Lydia...uhm..hi." He looked at me unsure of what to say.
"Harry I can't stand being away from you any longer." I took a step toward him.
"But Niall..." He looks at me confused about why I am here.
"I don't want to be with Niall. I want to be with you. He's not important to me." I say.
"Don't say that. You care about Niall and you know that." Harry says back.
"I know but not as much as I care about you. He's just not for me. He's not who I want to be with. I've been miserable without you." I confess to him.
"And you think I haven't? I have been dying without you." He takes a step closer to me.
"I missed hearing your voice. I miss your laugh. I miss watching movies whenever we didn't feel like going out. I miss looking into your blue eyes when you tell me a story." He took a few more steps until he was close enough where our lips almost touched.
"I miss kissing your lips." He said in almost a whisper. He looks straight into my eyes.
I grab the back of his neck and pull him to me our lips now pressed together. My lips move perfectly with his. Harry steps closer into me and wraps his arms around my waist pulling me closer to him. I bring my unoccupied hand up to his and tangle my fingers into it.
My phone starts to ring and I try to release myself from Harry's hold but he tightens his grip.
"Don't answer it. Stay close to me." He says against my lips. I accept and let the phone ring until it goes to voicemail.
...........
"What are you doing anyways?" I point to Harry's bed covered in papers, a textbook, and his laptop.
"I was studying." I raise my eyebrow at him.
"For what?" I ask.
"English lit. I'm in college." He tells me.
"Oh I didn't know that."
"I'm on the fall, winter course so I just started a few days ago." It was weird to think that Harry is in college. The other guys aren't in college. I'm planning on starting soon. I wanted to wait a year after high school before I actually started college.
"What college do you go to?" I ask Harry.
"Georgia tech." He answers.
"Oh. I was thinking about going there but I don't think I would get in so I'm planning on going to UGA." I tell him.
"What do you plan on majoring in?" He asks.
"Business ed. I want be a wedding planner." He looks at me and smiles.
"Nice. I'm majoring in photography and business." I look over at him.
"You're a photographer?" He nods his head.
"Yeah, well not yet. I'm studying it. I've been interested in photography since I was sixteen. My mom got me a camera for my sixteenth birthday and I started taking pictures then became obsessed."
He stands up and walks toward the closet then pulls out something and walks back over to the bed.
"This is my portfolio." He opens it to reveal his work.
"You can look through them." Harry says.
I start looking through the photographs and they are amazing. One catches my eye and I lift it up in front of me. It's of a blonde girl reaching her arms out and crying. You can't see what she's reaching for though.
"This one is beautiful. What does it mean?" I ask Harry about the photo.
"She's reaching for something that she has lost. Specifically the girl in the photo lost her father. He died and she's reaching for him but the picture is for anyone who has lost someone or something." Harry explains the message of the photo. I continue to look through the photographs.
"Wow Harry, you are really talented." He smiles at me.
"Thanks Lyd." He wraps his arms around my waist and kisses me on the cheek.
I sat on Harry's couch watching tv while I waited for him to come back from class.
I stayed the night last night and Niall has been calling me nonstop but I press the ignore button when his name shows up on the screen. I'm happy right now and I don't need Niall to ruin that for me. Not now. Finally being next to Harry with his arms around me while I sleep is the best feeling in the world. I have never felt the feelings that I have towards Harry for Niall. I need to tell Niall.
I stand up and grab my keys but before I open the door I can leave, I change my mind and put the keys back down on the coffee table. I'm not ready to talk to Niall about this. The only thing I need to do right now is wait for Harry to get back. This is my life. I can do what I want, not what Niall wants. I lay back down on the couch and grab my phone to text Harry.
"I miss you come home soon!" He quickly replies.
"I know baby. I miss you too. My last class is almost over I'll be home soon."
I set my phone back on the table and focus my attention back on the tv screen.
After about twenty minutes my phone starts to vibrate loudly against the wooden table. I look over to see Niall calling me. I pick up the phone and before I press ignore I move my thumb over to answer.
"Hello?" I bring the phone to my ear.
"Lydi! Where are you? I have been worried sick." Niall clearly says.
"Calm down. I just went back home cause I felt sick." I lie.
"Where are you now?" He asks me.
"The store to get medicine." I continue to lie.
"Do you need anything? I can come over."
"No I'll be fine. I need to go I'll talk to you later."
"Okay bye." I quickly hangup the phone and the front door opens.
"Hey Lyd did you miss me?" Harry gives me a big smile before walking over to give me a kiss.
"Yes, very." I tell him.
"I like to hear that." He laughs.
