Author Games: Ace of Spades

Finals: Addilyn Devella

Although Addilyn hated the dark she knew the importance that it played in her last moments. She would be thrust into darkness when the end came but if she didn't face it now then maybe, just maybe, she would never see the light again.

As she fumbled around for her old tape recorder, because iPhone were far too intricate for her to decipher, she was tempted to flick on the lamp. The constant patter of rain on the roof made it sound as though someone was knocking on her azure front door but she knew they wouldn't be here for a while – she hadn't been back here since she had left for the casino five years ago. Yet somehow she was thrust back into the night, just as the rain had been pounding on the phone booth it got heavier on her beautiful house.

Her hands, coated in a dry layer of blood, finally grasped the recorder hidden amongst the items in the dusty acacia wood drawer and, in the darkness of the familiar shadows, Addilyn sat herself down on her small work table and clocked the record button.

At first she was unaware what to say – if she said it all aloud the listener would think she was crazy but she knew that she had to let someone know before everything caught up to her and before they found here. She listened as the tape made a small humming noise as it spun and she took a deep audible breath with her lungs burning just as they did on the night that almost seemed to parallel this one is every single way.

"I don't exactly know where to begin," Addilyn's voice was much older than it was on the phone so long ago. Five years had changed her body for the worst and she had a feeling that there was barely a year left in her. Ironically, she had felt so close to death's hand in the casino but now she seemed to know exactly where it stood in her time. Nevertheless, she continued through her raspy voice that had a hint of softness to it, "There isn't much else I can say other than I love you, I think,"

She felt a tear trail down her cheek but she couldn't wipe it away without getting blood on her face too. She couldn't stand to have it anywhere on her body and as the blood caked her hands she felt it restrict the movement of her hands.

"I did all this for you," she began again, "I travelled to Mexico, Italy and Russia for you but you're...you're just invisible. Sometimes I wasn't quite sure whether you were real and that maybe he was playing a trick on me. I'd follow you to one place only to hear that you were thousands of miles away and yet somehow everything ends up back at home,"

A bang on the window startled Addilyn making her heart leap into her throat. Her eyes flew to the window to her left only to find a shadow of a willow tree brushing delicately on the glass. She rushed over and drew the curtains causing a wave of dust to flutter into the stale air that had already been trapped inside for so long. She sat back down at the table as she gave the room a final sweep before allowing her voice to emerge.

"I'm not quite sure what you work as but you must have been good. I remember seeing you in Merida with you golden hair – just like I had imagined it – glowing in the beach sun. I used to look like that, you know, back when I was travelling with the modelling industry. Even your eyes match mine; perhaps rounder like your fathers but you got my chocolate eyes that were always worth melting for. I know that you saw me too, did you recognise me? I didn't think you would since it has been so long. It was a miracle I found you but I gave up everything for it,"

Addilyn reminisced her day in Mexico when she had seen her daughter for the first time in over forty years. Although it was only a year ago when she had finally found her, Addilyn struggled to remember the day. She couldn't feel the sun kissing her skin or the sand beneath her feet = all she could remember was her daughter although she was conflicted whether this was good or bad.

"After that, I barely got a glimpse of you. Not in Venice, Istanbul or Moscow. It's funny how your father used to do the same thing to me – I suppose everything always goes back to the way it began," Addilyn chuckled but there was nothing funny about it, "So there is really no other option other than to give up on you. I cannot seem to find you...again,"