It's The Little Things. (completed)

remembering the first

                                       Remembering the first

You always remember your firsts. Your first day of school, first crush, first class, first teacher, first seat, first friend and so on. I will always remember my first friend, she wore light pink frock, she was sitting in the corner and crying her eyes out and then she lifted her head, sniffing, and looked at my way. And I, ofcourse being the creep I was, staring at her and then I walked up to her and asked her why is she crying because I didn’t want her to think I was in fact a creep. She was ‘missing her Mommy and her dolly was taken by the bad girl’. Then you have your first date, your first prom and so on. Then you have your first, which a girl always want to remember and have with the one she loves and be happy to lose it. But mine was taken away by my own mistake.

But this is different, totally different, a whole new level. My first ultrasound. Its so nerve wrecking, and my hands are sweaty and my mind is filled with what ifs. Then the nurse called my name.

I took a shaky breath and made my way to the doctor’s cabin. There was one thing in my mind:

“Please let everything be alright”

“Ah! Miss. Katharine. Please take a seat.” I sat on the chair and prepared myself for the worst to come, she bombarded me with question about how was I feeling? And how was my health condition? Any soreness? Any pain? And God knows what.

Then she directed me towards the bed. I lay down and lifted my shirt as per instructed. She poured cold gel jell on my till flat belly and I shivered. But she ignored it and continued on her work without a second glance.

“Okay! You this little dot” she asked me and I nodded my head and leaned a bit forward. “ well that’s your baby’s heart and that’s your baby” the way she explained it and looked at my little bud with adoration, made me tear up and few left my eyes and rolled down my cheeks and looked at it with so much love. I promised myself I will always love him/her and will protect him/her.

“Well that’s nice, the heart beat is strong and there is no problem as such. But please eat healthy and eat more. You have to eat for two now, and come on regular checkups and take all the medicines on time and don’t forget you health. I am kind of worried because you are a bit weak. It’s not a big issue, just precautions my dear!”

She gave me medications and asked to join yoga classes, because it will help to maintain my health. I was so concerned about my baby, that because of me I might harm him/her.

I bid her goodbye and left her cabin with strong determination after seeing my baby.

Next days passed by in a blur and joined yoga classes and took my medication and gained weight a little bit. The doctor’s checkups were good and she said the baby is healthy and everything was fine and good.

Now it was time for my dad to come back. I had grown a baby bump in these few weeks. I wore baggy clothes and loose pants; I am always in sweets at home or a big jersey. I am 12 weeks pregnant and my Dad will be finding it out now. I don’t know how he will react. Hell! In all this baby and Xavier fiasco I haven’t even thought about it. I haven’t even talked to Maggie and she will surely kill me. But can u blame me. I couldn’t talk to her. She is in another continent, meeting her fiancé’s family and Dad was on vacation. I can’t drag in my screwed life. That’s unfair to them. I don’t want to be the bad guy here.

I know my reasons are not strong but I am determined child and I stand my grounds and always shield my pride. I am like that. But I hate putting and being burden on others. That’s just not me.

So, with that in mind I got in my car and drove to pick up my Dad. And I am ready to face him. I m ready to stay strong for my baby. That’s why I wore a black dress that was tight but not suffocating. And showed my baby bump. And I proudly got out of car to pick up my Dad.

I walked in the waiting area and spotted my Dad and prepared myself for the worst. I walked up to him and hugged him from behind.

“I missed you Pappy” I screamed in his ear making him flinch. OH! How I loved to be a brat.

“Ohh my baby girl!” he turned and hugged me. “Wow! You gained weight” he looked down at me and noticed my bump and just ignored it.  He pulled back and strolled his trolley to my car and begun sipping his coffee. And handed me mine.

He thinks I am fat!

“Uumm! No Dad I am not fat. It happens when you are pregnant” he literally became a fountain and chocked. I rubbed his back and gave apologetic glances to people who notice. The just shook their head and went there ways.

“What?” dad shrieked and looked at me with wide eyes. “I have been out for what? Four months and you decided to get a preg-“he couldn’t finish his sentence and shook his head and began again. “I am not happy about it. But what done is done. I love you in every form. But please if you wanted to be spontaneous again try bungee jumping or skiing. You are too young my baby for a baby. Wow that rhymes, but that’s beyond topic,” he took a deep breath and started again. “I love you my baby, but huff what I can say now. Who is the father? Did you tell Maggie? Are you on regular checkup? When is the next checkup? Are you eating healthy? –“ I had to cut him. He was making me dizzy with all this emotional talk and becoming Maggie.

“PAPPY! I am fine. No! I haven’t told Maggie yet. She is in India, meeting Ashwin’s family and I don’t want her to worry more than she already is. You know it’s her in-laws and all. And yes I am eating healthy and taking my meds. As far as baby’ father is concerned. I rather not discuss hi. Please Dad” I pleaded him and he sighed and nodded. Then he rambled all about his trip and all about baby and asked me about business and so on.

When we reached our home, he excused himself saying he needed a bit rest and will talk later. I made my way to my room and looked up in the mirror and saw the adult I have become. I put my hand on my growing belly. I felt comforted. I love my baby so much and I will protect my little baby forever. 

 -----------------------------------------------------------------

hhmmm. comment and vote please.

love,

Aliza.