Undispatched

Day 4 : A Letter To Your Sibling

Dear Harrison,

Being part of an abnormally close family and having my younger brother as your best friend for most of my life. I am blessed.

Moving away is going to be hard. I'm going to miss out on so much. All the important times in your life. I won't be there to see you kill that boy and become a man.

I'll miss out on all the times you'll smile at that girl from class,when you think no one is looking . The one who is all cute but lately puts on a lot of makeup.

I'll miss out on all the times you'll try to work up courage to finally ask for her number.

I'll miss out on being there to give you advice when the coolest classmate, the one you've always secretly wanted to be like, takes you under his wing. I won't be there to tell you to decline when he offers you a blunt and tells you to take a drag.

I'll miss out on you going on your first date. The way you'll save up all your pocket money just to take the girl who wears too much make up to the fanciest restaurant in town.

All I'll be coming back to is my baby brother, being not so baby anymore.
I'll be coming back to my brother, being inches taller than I remember.
I'll be coming back to my brother, singing love songs in a baritone, thinking of that girl from class.
I'll be coming back to my brother, now having his own share of secrets like how it felt when he first held hands or how he kissed her face even though her makeup made him cough. I won't be a part of them.
I'll be coming back to my brother, avoiding to hold hands in public. He won't like it when I kiss him goodbye every morning before he leaves for school.
I'll be coming back to a different person.

I'm going to tell you of this one time.
You'd returned after a month long visit to our grandmother's place . I'd missed you so much. I'd missed telling you how my day went. How he'd finally smiled at me. How mom and dad had got into a big fight. How I wore your jacket on that first date. On the day after you returned I woke up to your face and your smile and your smell. That was the best morning of all the mornings in a long time. Followed by the best day of all days. We stayed in. You told me all about your stay at Nana's and I told you of all the things that happened in your absence. We sat on the verandah for over 4 hours, talking of all the things that mattered. All the things that didn't. When you finally decided it was time for your favourite TV show, I wanted you to sit for a while longer. Because in those 4 hours I forgot that it wasn't long before I left home. I forgot that you'd then be 24 hours away. I forgot that I'll be missing out on my best friend. I didn't tell you how much I loved you and how much I'd miss you when I was gone.

I'll miss you. I'll miss you so much.
I want you to know that I'm going to be just one call away.
I want us to have everything we have, irrespective of the distance.
I want you to tell me about your first heartbreak and all the ecstatic moments of hand holding.
Confide in me. I want to be your best friend forever.

I wanted to write this letter telling you about all the things about growing up but I'm going to let that be. I want you to do it on your own because I know you can. I'm always going to be there when you fall back. I'm going to help you up.

You're taller than me now but I hope I'm always someone that you can look up to. Please don't outgrow me.

I cant believe that I have to go on for a long time without seeing your face or waking up to your groggy voice. I'll miss you.

I love you. Good luck, to my man.

Love, Always.
Blythe ❤