I Want Her Love

Chapter 4-Nightmares

Tobins POV
The rest of the day goes by smoothly, the three of us hanging out and watching American Horror Story on Netflix.

I gotta say, this day started out pretty shitty, and the words that Abby said still run through my head, but I'll deal with that tomorrow. Tonight, I need to let loose a little bit.

Since my apartment had two bedrooms, I was letting Lexa and Clarke stay the night, just for fun.

We stayed up until about 11 o'clock just playing board games and talking, nothing too extraordinary, but still, it was an awesome way to take my mind off of what was to come tomorrow.

Whatever was going to happen.

"Hey Tobs you ready to head to bed? Clarke is passed out on me." Lexa says softly and indeed, a passed out Clarke sits on Lexas lap with her head on Lexa shoulder and I chuckle at the sight.

If only I had a girlfriend who I could do that with.

"Yeah, you know the way. I'll see you guys tomorrow. Goodnight Lexa." I say making my way to my own room, closing the door behind me and stripping into my sports bra, and putting on a pair of sweatpants.

I flop down onto the bed, putting my hands behind my head, just staring up at the ceiling. Thinking.

I adored Lexa's and Clarke's relationship. They were both like close sisters to me and I couldn't be happier for them.

But sometimes the sight of them, just made me envious. Not that I wasn't happy for them, but I just have a dull ache inside of me, that I doubt can and will be filled by anyone.

Hell, nobody really even likes me at that school. The one girl I do have a crush on, is dating the guy who's ruined my life for the past few years... Nothing's going right.

But it's just as though I need her love. Call me desperate or obsessed, but the feelings that I have for her.. are overpowering.

But I know things with her and I would never happen. For one, she's already taken. And two, I doubt she's even into girls like that.

'Well Tobs, probably gonna stay single for quite some time... better start getting used to it.' I think to myself.

I mean of course I've had a girlfriend, things didn't last very long between us because of all the rumors that spread around about me.

She didn't want her reputation to go down by dating me, though I hated not only her, but myself too. I'm not one to hold grudges against people.

Unless its Servando or someone in his squad of friends... then that's a different story.

I start to feel myself doze off, slowly drifting off to sleep.
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Alex and I sit together on the couch in the new house the four of us, Clarke, Lexa, Alex, and I are renting together. Clarke and Lexa are down the hall in their room when I hear a knock on the door.

"I got it, it's the pizza." I say grabbing my wallet.

I kiss Alex on the cheek before walking to the door, unlocking it about to take out my card until I look up and my face pales.